Normalcy
by notadryeeye
Summary: Harry gets one night that gives him a glimpse into what life could be like with the Dursley's. But events turn for the worse and both Harry and the wizarding world are left wondering what it's consquences mean for the future of the world.
1. Chapter 1

Harry lay sprawled out on his bed, his long limbs hanging off the edges, staring at the ceiling. He lay there fully clothed in a new pants and dress shirt that he had recently purchased, waiting for the booming voice of Vernon Dursley to call him down to the den.

Though Harry had to admit he liked the way his new, proper fitting clothes looked on him, he wasn't looking forward to spending the entire night at a wedding for Dudley's girlfriend's sister, with the Dursley's , who most undoubtedly did not want him there.

The Dursley's never would have even considered inviting him along, but Dudley's new girlfriend Sara, who had a habit of being nice to Harry, had asked him if he was bringing a date to the wedding. When Harry told her he wasn't going because he didn't think he was invited, she had insisted that he was going (it was her sister's wedding so she could invite whomever she wanted), and had whisked him and Dudley off to a local shopping centre and helped Harry pick out an outfit.

Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia, who did not want to upset Dudley by making a scene about Harry's "unnaturalness" in front of his girlfriend, had no choice but to allow Harry to be invited to the wedding. But the minute Sara had left the house, they had berated Harry for "inviting himself" to the wedding, and warned him that if he screwed this up he'd find himself locked in the cupboard again for an undisclosed, but long period of time.

Harry found these threats to be empty. He'd be seventeen in a few days and could easily and legally magic himself out if he did happen to "cause a scene" at the wedding. He'd be leaving in a few days anyway to attend Bill and Fleur's wedding and then start his hunt for the Horcruxes with Ron and Hermione, and he doubted that the Dursley's and a cupboard would deter his plans.

After getting invited to the wedding he had to, of course, owl the Order to tell them where he'd be going, since they had a nasty habit of watching and following him these days. And he'd also owled Ron and Hermione about the whole event. The two of them had spent the first few weeks of summer at the Dursley's with Harry, but had recently returned, on Harry's insistence, home to spend time with their own families. They both had met Sara and liked her, despite her dating Dudley, and would get a kick out of her inviting Harry right under the Dursley's noses.

"Boy, Get down here! We're leaving!" shouted Vernon from the foot of the stairs. Harry shook himself from his self-induced stupor and rose from the bed, straitening his clothes and checking his reflection in the mirror.

'Not bad,' he thought to himself, examining his strong, chiseled jaw line and recently shaved face. He'd started to notice not long ago that his face no longer held any of the adolescent roundness that made him look like he might be twelve and he had to admit that he was starting to look like a man of seventeen. He'd grown a few inches, and was now just a shade over six feet. He still was skinny for being seventeen, but he no longer had that awkward, too scrawny look about him. He'd filled out in the shoulders and chest area and his arm and stomach muscles were clearly definable, even under Dudley's hand-me-downs.

Apparently he wasn't too bad looking. He had noticed the smiles and looks he received from girls he had passed while shopping with Dudley and Sara. Sara had even mentioned how handsome he had looked when she forced him to come out of the changing room to model his outfit.

"I don't know how the girl's keep their hands off of you at that school you go to," Sara had said eying him up, "Whoever she is, she's a lucky girl." All Harry could do was smirk stupidly and watch with delight as Dudley's face contorted into bulge of rage and jealousy.

Sara wasn't bad looking and she was really nice. Harry couldn't fathom how she had ended up with an oaf like Dudley, but she seemed to have a good effect on his pig-headed demeanor. Harry wasn't interested in Sara like that. Dudley could have her. His heart belonged to someone else, but he couldn't think about that right now.

Eyeing himself up in the mirror again, he tried to flatten his hair and tuck parts of it behind his ears to tame it a bit. He still had his impossibly messy mop of black hair on his head that refused to lay flat no matter what. But it suited him and added to his looks. He had even let it grow a bit longer, almost to his shoulders, and he enjoyed this shaggier look.

"Boy! GET DOWN HERE NOW!" screamed Vernon from down the stairs. Harry quickly pulled himself away from the mirror and bounded down the stairs to meet the Dursley's, who were standing near the door, Dudley and Vernon in suits and Aunt Petunia in a stuffy blue dress, all clearly ready and waiting to leave.

"I mean what I said," whispered Vernon in a forced calmness, taking Harry's new red dress shirt in his stubby fingers, "anything funny happens, anything out of the ordinary, and I'll shove you in that cupboard and throw away the key."

Harry nodded and followed the Dursley's out the front door, climbing into the backseat of the silver Audi next to Dudley, who glared at him with a look of utter loathing and then turned to look out the window.

It's not like Harry especially wanted to spend the evening at a wedding with the Dursleys. But Sara had invited him and he wanted to be nice. Plus, he'd never been to a wedding before, or any real party for that matter. 'It could be fun' he thought to himself. 'And I could use some of that,' he whispered silently as the Dursley's car pulled out of the driveway and onto the road.

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'Do n't think I've had that much fun in….well…forever,' Harry thought to himself as he plopped into the backseat of the Dursley's Audi. A tired looking Dudley opened the other backseat door and scooted over next to Harry, pulling Sara in after him.

"Have a good time," smiled Sara over Dudley who was holding her hand and smiling stupidly at her.  
"Yeah, I had a blast. Thanks for inviting me," Harry grinned, throwing his head back against the headrest and closing his eyes. The truth was he had had fun. He was exhausted from the loudness and chaotic nature of the wedding reception. He was full from the delicious food at the dinner. And he was a bit tipsy from the few glasses of beer he had.

For a few hours, Harry had been able to forget about the Prophecy, about the Horcruxes, and about his destiny. For the first time in a long time, he'd felt seventeen. Hell, he'd even played a drinking game with Dudley, which he could proudly say he'd won. Everything about the night had just seemed so surreal, so surreal that he felt…normal.

"I didn't know you could dance Potter," blurted Dudley suddenly. Whether it was the alcohol or the fact that Dudley was holding the hand of a very pretty girl that made him talk, Harry didn't know, but it still brought a smile to his face.

"Neither did I," smirked Harry, not bothering to lift his head or open his eyes. His thoughts flickered back to a few hours ago when Sara had pulled him unwillingly onto the dance floor after spotting him sitting in a corner by himself, sipping a beer. She'd been adamant about not letting him scoot off the floor and had forced him to dance. He thought he must have looked incredibly stupid. The only time he had ever danced before had been at the Yule Ball during fourth year, and if memory served him correctly, and he wasn't exactly graceful.

But shortly after the music had stopped and both he and Sara were giggling and forgetting their inhibitions, a very pretty blonde girl had came up from behind him and asked if he'd dance with her. After a push from Sara, he'd found himself dancing with her, and then with several other girls at the wedding.

A very flustered-looking Uncle Vernon dropped himself into the driver's seat and reached across to open the door for his wife. Aunt Petunia scooted into the passenger seat and turned to face the teens in the backseat.

"Did you all have a nice time," she said smiling, obviously forgetting Harry was sitting in the back too. 

"Yeah," chimed the three teens.

Uncle Vernon made a coughing noise in the front seat and fired up the car.

"Are you alright Vernon?" questioned Aunt Petunia, giving her husband a worried look. Uncle Vernon was red, well, redder than usual, and despite sitting down and not doing anything strenuous, he was sweating.

"Yes, I'm just a bit tired I guess from all the excitement," he said giving his wife a reassuring pat on the arm.

Petunia seemed to accept this and turned her attention to the radio, to which she switched on and turned to her favorite station. Vernon put the car into drive and pulled onto the roadway that led back to Little Winging.

Harry was still lost in the bliss he was experiencing from that evening. He hadn't been that happy or had that much fun in a while. The time he'd spent recently with his friends had been filled with a few lighthearted moments, like Ron finally getting up the courage to take his relationship with Hermione seriously.

But in the background had always been that dread, the waiting for something to happen, and the feeling that he was putting his life on hold until he had destroyed Voldemort. But tonight, he had put all that aside. It had felt so good to let loose and act like there wasn't a care in the world. He'd drank a little, had fun…with Dudley of all people, and had even danced with girls he had just met.

He'd enjoyed it and had fun, but still, underneath all that fun, he wished there was one person he could have shared it with. There was one person he wished he could have shared a dance, or two, or ten with. Every girl he danced with that night, he had pretended it was Ginny he was holding.

'I've never danced with her,' he thought to himself.

Suddenly he found himself dreaming of Ginny. Remembering their walks around the lake and snuggling on the couch in Gryffindor common room, he let all the memories he had been trying to suppress, flood into his mind. God he missed her. And it was so unfair that he couldn't have her. He had to do what was right and protect her. It was the only way they could ensure that they'd have a life together after this was all over, after he became a murder or...well...he didn't want to think of the alternative at the moment.

"Wonder if she'll dance with me at her brother's wedding?" he mumbled to himself. A small smile slid across his face as images of Ginny looking beautiful in her bridesmaid's robes and dancing closely in his arms flitted across his consciousness.

"What are you smiling about Harry? Your gir--" but Sara's sassy inquiry was drown out by Aunt Petunia's screams coming from the front seat. Harry's eyes shot open and he quickly scanned the front seat.

Uncle Vernon's hulking figure was hunched over the steering wheel. Sick, choking noises were coming from his throat and he had gone into convulsions, his meaty neck now turning blue.

"Vernon! VERNON!" Aunt Petunia screamed again, shaking her husband and desperately trying to take control of the steering wheel that was now pinned beneath his massive, unconcious girth. He was too heavy for her to lift, and his huge frame was now steering the car straight towards the guardrail on the opposite side of the road, his dead weight pressing on the accelerator.

Harry's first instinct was to grab for his wand and somehow get Uncle Vernon's weight off the wheel. But as he reached toward his back pocket, he suddenly realized he hadn't brought it. He didn't think he'd need it tonight and he really hadn't had a place to put it in his new clothes. STUPID!

Relying on his Quidditch instincts and reflexes, he unbuckled his seatbelt and reached forward to jerk the wheel. But it was too late. The silver Audi hit the metal guardrail head on. 

There was a sickening crunch of metal on metal and a squeal of sparks as the car smashed through the barrier. Harry suddenly felt his body become airborne as the car careened down the side of the steep hill

'The seatbelt!' he screamed in his head as the car flipped over and Harry saw the windshield and the tree that the car was about to hit coming at him. Before he could register the sick crunching noise of his body hitting the windshield, blackness had consumed him.

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'What the hell is that buzzing noise?' he thought to himself. A loud drone or humming noise was filling his ears, everything else seemed muffled and he could hear faint noises piercing the humming...'It sounded like...no it couldn't be...who'd be screaming?' If only he could open his eyes see where it was coming from he could use his wand and make it stop, it was really hard to sleep with all that noise.

Sleep...yeah that sounds good.  
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Sara groped around and felt for the seatbelt that was holding her in. She found the buckle and pushed it, waiting for a soft click. Holding the side of the car, she slid herself down to the floor, which had previously been the roof and crawled through the broken glass of the crumpled window and onto the soft grass beside the car. She surveyed herself, feeling for any broken bones or other serious injuries, but found only cuts and scrapes, and one hell of a bump on her head. 

She looked back into the car, expecting to see Dudley, who had been strapped in beside her before they had crashed, but there was no one in the back seat.

"Dudley?" she called out loud, hoping he was somewhere nearby. She called again when she got no answer and a scraping noise could be heard coming from the passenger side of the car. Sara limped around the back of the car to see Dudley frantically pulling at the mangled and crumpled car door.

Sara breathed a sigh of relief at the sight of Dudley. He didn't look injured; he was standing and trying to get someone out. Sara hurried over to his side and peered into the overturned wreck. Petunia Dursley as still strapped in her seat, her eyes wide open, but non-seeing. Her neck was bent at a strange angle and her face covered in a thin layer of blood. She was dead.

This clearly hadn't registered with Dudley and he continued to frantically pull at the door, hoping to drag out his mother. Sara reached out a hand to touch Dudley's shoulder and he pulled back on contact. 

"Dad's dead." Dudley cried frantically, "We need to get Mum out, she's still trapped and there's gas leaking...we need to..."

"Dudley," Sara whispered bracingly, "You can't help her; we need to get away from here in case that gas catches fire." She turned her head toward the mangled back end of the car and could see the clear liquid wetting the ground around them.

But Dudley just stood there, staring at the car, at his parents, feeling truly alone for the first time in his life.

"Dudley, come on...we need to get as far away as we can and wait until help comes," gasped Sara, trying to tug Dudley away from the wreck, "Your back is bleeding, we need to get that taken care of."

Sara took him by his hand and started to lead him away. She turned back to view the wrecked car, checking to see if there was any sign of fire that might prematurely ignite it. She glanced at the car and couldn't help put feel sad, feel Dudley's pain. He'd lost his mom and dad and they wouldn't be there to watch him go through the important parts of his adulthood. He and Harry were both alone now. Dudley had told her about how Harry's parents had died in a car crash when he was little and had been sent to...'Shit!'

"Dudley, where's Harry?" Sara shouted, spinning him around to face her.

"Dunno...I didn't see him anywhere. He wasn't in the car when I got out," mumbled Dudley, continuing to stare blankly into the night, tears rolling freely down his cheeks.

"Dud, wait. We have to go see if he's not still in the car...what if that gas..." but Dudley cut her off and turned quickly toward the car.

"He wasn't in the car, I would have seen him when I...when I checked on Dad..." Dudley trailed off and stared at the ground that was covered in ruts and deep gouges from the path of the car. Dudley seemed to be contemplating the ruts, deep in thought, when his head popped up and he started at Sara.

"He wasn't wearing his seatbelt. He tried to stop the car from crashing... he tried to grab the wheel...tried to save us," stuttered Dudley with a look of dawning comprehension.

"He could have been thrown from the car and he could be badly hurt. We need to go back and see..." urged Sara, whipping around towards the car. But Dudley grabbed her arm and started dragging her further away.

"What are you--Dudley--let go!"

"That car could start on fire and we'd both be killed," scowled Dudley, "I'm not going to lose you too. Besides, Potter can take care of himself."

"Are you crazy?! What if the car explodes and he's still alive? For God's sake Dudley... Harry's your cousin," snarled Sara as she wrenched her arm out of Dudley's grasp and started back toward the car.

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"He...c ar...hurt...need to see...What are you?...go!"

"Car could...fire...we'd ...killed...lose you...Potter..."

Snippets of a heated conversation woke Harry out of his slumber and he lay there with his eyes closed, not wanted to move or open them. He must have been deep asleep because the voices were muffled and he felt so warm and fuzzy. Maybe the Dursley's had left him in the car and gone in without him. Maybe that was them inside still shouting about allowing Harry to go to the wedding. 'Maybe I'll just stay here for a bit, venture inside if it gets too cold,' he thought to himself.

"...crazy...car explodes...still alive...Harry...cousin"

What were they talking about an exploding car for? And what did that have to do with him? They couldn't be possibly blaming Harry for an exploding car that he had no recollection of. His magic had gotten out of hand a few times, sure...but he wasn't so pissed tonight that he didn't recall blowing up any cars.

'Wait a minute...car...Uncle Vernon...guard rail...windshield...Oh God!'

His instant realization seemed to shake him out of his slumber and he was thrown back into his senses. The muffled sounds that his ears had been picking up on the past few minutes suddenly were loud and clear. He could hear a car engine humming loudly in the background and the noise of the wind whistling through the tree above him. He could hear someone calling his name...a girl...Sara.

And Merlin did his head hurt. As a matter of fact, his whole body felt like it had been run over by the Knight Bus, several times. He tried opening his eyes, afraid of what he'd see when he did. His eyes fluttered open and struggled to get a handle on his surroundings as things seemed to spin and come in and out of focus. Squinting into the darkness, he could make out the front end of the car he'd been riding in.

Harry slowly moved his head from side to side trying to figure out exactly where he was, but could only see the car in front of him because it hurt to bad to move. The pain was beginning to get to him and he felt his breath catching in his chest. He leaned his head back and found it met a hard surface behind him. Looking up, he saw the thick branches of a huge oak tree branching out above him. 'At least I didn't hit the tree with my face' he thought brightly to himself, letting a small laugh go. But the force of the laugh caused the pain to intensify and he felt a warm bubbly feeling creep up his throat. He coughed, and felt something wet fall down his chin.

"Oh God," he cried to himself, at the same time someone nearby said the same thing.

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Sara ran back to see if she could find Harry. She thought maybe he had been thrown from the car and had landed farther away. She scanned the area around the car, looking for possible places he could have landed, hoping she wouldn't find him dead with a broken neck somewhere. She ran past the tree that the car was pinned up against, to see if maybe he had landed in the little clearing beyond the tree line. She had almost given up hope when she had heard a coughing noise coming from behind her. Spinning around her breath caught in her chest and she let out a cry of horror.

"Oh God," cried Sara, "Dudley get over here now!"

She rushed over to the front end of the car that was smashed up against the tree where it had come to rest, and braced herself for what she was going to see. Harry was lying against the big oak tree, his head flat against the trunk, the car pinning the right side of his body just below his chest. He was coughing and struggling to catch his breath and his eyes were searching wildly for help. His face was cut and bloodied, but she could tell that was coughing up blood because of the fresh wave of crimson that was wetting his chin. That was not a good sign...that meant internal bleeding.

"Harry?" she whispered, her voice breaking for the first time tonight. She knelt down beside him trying to find a way to get him out and found herself fighting the urge to vomit. She had to look away.

His right arm had been severed, and a sharp piece of his upper arm bone was sticking sickly from his shoulder socket. He was in obvious pain and hysterics and didn't seem to be aware of it or her presence as he struggled for air. She called his name again and grabbed his free left hand. He turned his head toward her and looked at her with those green eyes that were now filled with horror.

"Sara?" he questioned, looking towards her with a look of helplessness. He let out a whimper of anguish and leaned his head back against the tree.

Dudley had made his way over to Sara, not realizing she had found Harry pinned between the car and tree until he was right beside the car.

"Sara, I can't find him. Maybe we should--Oh shit!" he started upon seeing Harry. His face visibly paled in the darkness and his face took on a look of horror and utter revulsion.

"Dud...we need to get him out of here," she said turning her head toward the car and gesturing at the gas leak. Dudley stood there staring at Harry and didn't seem to register what Sara had just said.

"DUDLEY!" she shouted, "I need you to see if you can't pull the car back a bit so I can slip him out of there."

Dudley looked at his girlfriend incredulously. How was he supposed to lift a car? Sara picked up on his questioning look and stood up and strode over toward him.

"Dudley...please...he's still alive and we need to get him away from here so help can get to him," she pleaded to her boyfriend, placing her hand on his waist.

"Sara...how do we know we won't hurt him more if we move it off of him?"

"We don't. But if that car explodes, he's dead anyway," she whispered turning back to Harry.

"Harry? Dudley's going to see if he can't get you out of here, ok? I'm going to pull you out and we need to get away from the car," she said soothingly, waiting for him to acknowledge her. He shook his head and closed his eyes against the pain.

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Harry watched Dudley walk around to the other side of the car next to him, the side that was pinning him and stopped, staring at his own right shoulder. His arm was gone. A piece of bone was sticking out of the socket and the flesh above it was ripped and torn away. He stared at the spot stupidly, moving his right shoulder socket, watching the remaining bone move back and forth. He knew this was bad, but somehow the fact that his arm had been ripped off didn't register in his brain. It didn't register that this was his arm, his body.

Harry was snapped out of his trance when he felt the car against him shudder and move. He felt Sara's hands grip his left arm and shoulder and pull him out from against the tree. Pain beyond pain ripped through him and he wanted to scream. He felt her dragging him against the soft grass, each step she took, jarring him and sending waves of pain up and down his body.

She stopped about a half a minute later and lay him down on the grass so that he was looking up at the stars that were visible through a clear patch in the clouds. He still couldn't catch his breath and his side and stomach were killing him. The area around him was serenely quiet, though he could still here the soft hum of the still running car in the background. Cutting through the silence, a sharp wail of a siren could be heard and he felt Sara let out a soft cry of thanks as she knelt next to him.

"Hang on Harry...help is coming...you're going to be..." but Sara's words started to become softer and he could feel warmth spread throughout his body, numbing the pain of his injuries. His breath started to come in more shallow gasps and he found it suddenly hard to focus on anything.

"Harry! HARRY! Look at me...stay with me...just a little longer ok?" Sara cried, holding his face and forcing him to look at her.

Harry didn't know if he could hang on any longer. The sirens were getting louder, but he didn't know if they'd get here soon enough.

'I'm dying.' he thought to himself. And suddenly the heaviness of his words hit him hard. If he was dying he'd never get to see Ron or Hermione...or Ginny. If he died, what would happen to them or the rest of the wizarding world for that matter? He was the only one who could kill Voldemort. If he died, all his friends and everyone he loved were doomed.

But the darkness seemed to be clouding his consciousness and he knew he had to say something before he couldn't any longer.

"Tell...tell...Ron and...Hermione...tell them...I'm...I'm sorry," he coughed, a fresh patch of blood wetting his chin.

"Don't Harry...just hang on," choked Sara, grasping his hand.

"No...tell them...tell Ginny...tell her...I...love...love her..." Harry stammered, closing his eyes.

In the background he could hear footsteps and shouts of people running toward them. He opened his eyes to see a uniform clad police officer and an emergency worker running towards them.

"What's his name," he heard a male voice shout.

"Harry." said Sara through tears.

"Harry? My name is Cliff. Harry I need you to stay with me...look at me big guy. Harry...Harry...stay with me..." but Cliff, whoever he was, faded away and the blackness that had been threatening, overtook him


	2. Chapter 2: Frantic

Chapter 2: Frantic

Tonks shifted slightly on her broom to ease the ache that was beginning to set in on her lower back area. She was on watch tonight and had been following the Dursley's car along the highway for about a half an hour on her broom, trying to stay hidden just above the cloud line. The Order had recieved an owl from Harry earlier on in the week telling them that he planned on going to a wedding with the Dursley's (actually he had been invited by Dudley's girlfriend), and wanted to know if it would be alright, considering he was under twenty-four hour surveillence these days.

The members of the Order had been hesitant about letting Harry leave the Dursley's and go into such a chaotic situation as a wedding. There just wasn't a way to stake out all angles and protect him fully. Harry was important to the war effort and all the members knew that Dumbledore, even after his death, wanted them to protect him and keep him out of harm's way. None of the members of the Order knew exactly what part Harry was to play, but with Voldemort after him constantly, watch on Number 4 Privet Drive and anywhere Harry went was a heavy priority.

Tonks had been one of the members to speak up at the last meeting, stating that Harry deserved to have a little fun. She knew from watching him on previous guard duties, that he'd had a rough time of it at his aunt and uncle's house and she hated seeing him isolated and sullen all the time. She knew that there were things weighing heavily on the sixteen year old's shoulders. He'd seen so much and had suffered so much pain and loss in his sixteen years. He'd been put through things and survived situations that full grown wizards and trained Auror's like herself would never dream of. Yes, he deserved a night out to be sixteen.

So Tonks, along with some newer members of the Order had volunteered to follow the car on brooms, and then attend the wedding in disguise, staking out any potential hazards or threats. She had enjoyed watching Harry make a fool out of himself on the dance floor and get a little tipsy. He had laughed and smiled and had the time of his life and Tonks had felt her heart lift just watching him.

"We'll never get to sleep if that fat-headed Dursley doesn't drive any faster. It doesn't take more than an hour and a half to get back to Surrey," shouted Hawkins, a young brown-haired witch flying to Tonk's left. Tonk's couldn't agree more. It was a muggy and wet night and flying in the midst of it didn't exactly make for a comfortable broom ride. Tonk's robes were starting to stick to her back and she could feel the moisture forming where her hands had been clutching her broom for a half an hour.

"Maybe it'll rain and cool us down, though I don't think I'd appreciate getting soaked," smiled a young blonde wizard by the name of O'Connor. In her mind, Tonk's wouldn't mind a bit of cool rain, but the thought of how heavy her robes would get and how awful that would feel while flying on her broom, turned her off to that notion.Tonks glanced down again at the small dot of the Dursley's car winding down the dark highway, making sure that nothing had happened while they were shouting to each other.

"Looks like some pretty heavy cloud cover coming up," yelled Hawkins as she dissapeared into a thick white cloud. Tonks looked up just in time to see a very thick and heavy patch of clouds coming up. Within seconds her vision was reduced to almost nothing and she dove a bit lower to see if she couldn't break through and get a clear view of the car. But as she dove lower she found that a thick patch of fog blocked all view of the road and the car.

"Shit!" Tonks shouted to herself, "Hawkins! O'Connor! Can you see the road?"

"Nope, If I go any lower I'm afraid I might be on the road...can't see a bloody thing!" yelled a female voice through the haze.

"Tonks? I think we should climb higher and see if we can't find a break in this. We're not going to be able to see a thing until we clear this fog," came O'Connor's husky Irish voice.

"Alright...break above the clouds and let's regroup," bellowed Tonks. Shooting straight up, she broke through the top of the clouds and could see the clear night sky and all the stars above. Looking around, she saw both her partners shoot through the fluffy cloudcover and break into the clearing above them. Tonks took out her compass from the inside of her cloak and held it out in front of her.

"Right. Highway heads south, so if we follow this until we see a break in this fog we'll intercept the car. O'Connor, I need you to ride a bit lower, see if you can't break through and see something. Hawkins and I will ride above the clouds. If you find anything, send up your patronus and we'll join you," said Tonks shaking her head assuringly.

The young male wizard took off into the clouds and the two witches skimmed above the cloudtops, searching for a break. 

"Tonks! Found it!" hollered O'Connor through the clouds. Tonks manuevered her broom into the thick patch of clouds and broke through underneath the cover. She looked over at her male counterpart and he pointed toward the highway. There it was. The pinpricks of headlights could be seen as the silver car snaked it's way down the highway and into the night.

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"Wasn't that the turnoff?" shouted O'Connor from behind Tonks. Tonks spun around and surveyed the road below. The car they had been following for the past hour was now heading toward the east, away from the soft glowing lights of Little Winging.

"Yeah...maybe he missed the exit or maybe he had to go to the market to pick something up?" shouted Tonks from her broomstick.

"At one in the morning Tonks?" inquired Hawkins from just beside Tonks.

A sudden panic filled Tonks and she thought wildly. Surely this was the car they had been following for the last hour. They might have lost it in the fog, but it was the only car on the road the whole time they'd been flying. Or was it?A sick filling crept up her throat and she suddenly felt very hot.

"O'Connor. Fly to Privet Drive and see if they didn't arrive home yet. Hawkins. Follow that car and see where it goes. I'll stay right here and report back to me when you can. Maybe we flew ahead of it when we lost the car and they'll come this way if they are," barked Tonks.

Tonks watched her two partners wip off into the night toward their destinations. Tonks guided her own broomstick upward and just into the cloudcover, where she hovered, watching the roadway below intently. 'What did I do now?' she thought to herself, 'I'm the one who suggested we let him go and now something goes wrong on my watch. God Harry...you better be alright.'

The roadway below her was empty and she was starting to get worried when neither of her partners had returned. 'Maybe i'll send my Patronus to Harry and see where they are. The Dursley's would freak...but at least i'd feel better,' she said to herself. She raised her wand and cast her Patronus into the night, sending her message with it, asking Harry to return it with his Patronus.

Five minutes later she heard a rush of an approaching broom in the night air and wipped around to see O'Connor speeding toward her. He had a worried look on his face and his tan face was paled in the moonlight.

"I checked the entire house and the yard. There was no one home and there was no trace that the car came back," stammered O'Connor.

"Damn!" cried Tonks, "I guess we'll wait for Hawkins and I sent a Patronus to Harry. I hope we get word soon."

Not a minute later, Hawkins pulled her broom beside the two others.

"That car pulled into a house a few miles East of the town. It was an older couple that got out of the car," reported Hawkins, looking down at the road below.

"Are you sure?" impored Tonks

"Yes"

"Damn!" swore Tonks who was now very worried. Her Patronus had not come back and it had been several minutes. Even at a great distance, it should have only been a matter of minutes for the Patronus to reach him.She knew what she had to do. She would have to go back to Grimmauld Place and alert the Order that Harry and the Dursley's were missing. God would she catch flack for this. What would she tell Remus?

"You to scan the area and then make your way back down the highway and see if you can't find the car. I'm going to go and alert the Order. If you find anything...anything at all...report back to Headquarters," ordered Tonks.

"Ok," chimed the two young wizards as they flew off to search the surrounding area.

Tonks landed in the cover of a thin tree line and hid her broom from sight. Sighing into the night and taking a deep breath she Apparated to Number Twelve Grimmauld Place to tell the Order she had lost Harry Potter.

----------------------------- ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------- ------

Molly Weasley was sitting in her favorite chair, sipping a warm glass of cocoa she had just made. It had been a long day. She had spent most of it with Fleur, planning wedding details and trying to teach her new daugher-in-law to cook. The cocoa hit the spot and curling up in her flannel nightgown, she was listening to the silence that was now echoeing through the house. Everyone was asleep after a long day of fixing up the Burrow, and night time was the only time that the house was ever quiet.

It'd been a long time since she had all of her family back under one roof. But this summer her older boys (minus Percy) had decided to come home and help out around the house with wedding preparations and Order bussiness. It felt nice to have everyone here, especially in times like these. They were in the midst of a war and Molly spent almost every minute of her day worrying about whether her family would make it through unscathed.

Molly watched the dying fire in the hearth crackle and pop as it illuminated the dark room. She felt her eyes drooping and struggled to keep them open. Sensing sleep was imminent; she picked up her mug of cocoa from the table next to her and made her way to the kitchen. She set the empty mug in the sink and looked out the big bay window watching the thin patch of clouds washing over the full moon. 'It looks so beautiful out tonight' she thought to herself.

She was just about to make her way up the stairs to retire for the night when she heard a pop come from the sitting room and heard a voice call "Molly, Arthur?" She was used to members of the Order popping in and out of the Burrow at all hours of the night, but every time she heard that fire, she was afraid that bad news was not far behind.

Calling for Arthur to come downstairs, Molly made her way to the sitting room to see the head of a rather rattled Remus Lupin dancing in the now blazing green fire lit inside the hearth.  
"Arthur will be down in a minute Remus. What is it?" she asked, hoping to God this was normal late night call.

"We have a problem. I really need to speak to……. Arthur," Remus sputtered as the bed headed figure of Arthur Weasley ambled into the sitting room.

"Remus, what is it?" asked Mr. Weasley, running a hand through his thinning red hair.

Remus looked around at Molly, almost as if he wanted her to leave the room. Arthur picked up on Remus's hesitance to discuss the situation in front of his wife and quickly thought of a way to politely ask her to leave the room.

"Molly why don't you go wake Charlie and Bill," whispered Arthur soothingly to his wife and then turned to Lupin's head in the fire, "Remus why don't you come on over here." She gave him a questioning look and headed quickly up the stairs to wake her two eldest boys.

Turning back to the fire, the figure of Remus Lupin came spinning into view and he landed awkwardly in the sitting room. Remus looked as though he had been running his hands incessantly through his graying hair and was still in his bed clothes. Obviously he had some bad news if he had Floo'd over in his pajamas.

"Remus what…." started Mr. Weasley but was cut off.

"Tonk's arrived back at headquarters a few minutes ago. They'd been on duty all night watching Harry and the Dursley's at the wedding he wrote to us about. They were on the way back to Little Winging when they ran into some heavy fog and lost the car for a bit. When they got their bearings, they found the car on the road again and followed it," Remus hesitated and looked as though he was going to be sick with worry.

"And...?" 

"And when they reached the turn-off to Little Winging the car continued south and ended up somewhere east of the city. It wasn't the Dursley's car. And they went to Privet Drive to see if they had arrived back…..and no one had been home," blurted Remus.

"Arthur. Harry's missing."

There was a gasp from the stairs as Molly made her way back downstairs.

"What do you mean he's missing? What if he's hurt? What if….. Oh God!" Molly cried as she placed a shaking hand over her mouth and visibly paled in the dark room. Bill made to stand behind his mum and helped her sit in one of the armchairs.

"Molly–we don't know anything for sure yet," Arthur reassured his wife, but casting questioning glances at Remus who was fiddling with something inside his robes.

"How long has it been since he's been seen?" asked Charlie from just inside the door frame.  
Remus retold the story of the Auror's losing the car in the fog and concerned and worried looks slid across the faces of the Weasley men. After a short silence Bill spoke up.

"Remus, it could be nothing. They could have stopped somewhere, or maybe they stopped for the night at a hotel or something. We could be overreacting. If Harry was in trouble don't you think he'd try and contact us somehow?" affirmed Bill.

"Tonks sent a Patronus to see if she couldn't locate him. The Patronus never was returned. She waited and even sent it a second time after she'd come here to alert the Order. Something's not right…." responded Remus, his eyes studying the carpet of the sitting room intently.

Mrs. Weasley began to quietly whimper as she thought of all the horrible possibilities that could come with Harry's disappearance. She thought of Harry as a son, one of her own, and losing him was almost too horrible to comprehend. Bill put a reassuring arm around his mom and held her closer.

"Mum, don't worry. Harry's a tough kid and a great wizard….." Bill's voice trailed off as he thought of something else to comfort his hysteric mother, "He's gotten out of some bad scrapes in the past and I'm sure he's fine."

Remus cleared his throat and reached inside his robes, pulling out the object he'd been playing with within them.

"Bill….Harry didn't have his wand on him. O'Connor found this at Privet Drive when he searched the house. He could be anywhere and he's without his wand. He's vulnerable and that's what scares me," choked Remus as he brandished Harry's wand in his hand, fumbling with it as he struggled to hold his emotions in check.

"What are we doing standing here? What's being done?" exclaimed Bill as he left his mother's side and stood up.

"We've got Moody, Kingsley, Elphias, and Hestia helping O'Connor and Hawkins retrace the route and search the surrounding area. Other members are searching places like Diagon Alley, Hogsmeade and trying to pick up information on any Death Eater activity. We've got all members on it right now. Dora is going to stay at Grimmauld Place incase he shows up," answered Remus as he clutched Harry's wand.

"What can we do?" asked Arthur.  
"Bill and Charlie…..you can join the rest of the Order trying to search the surrounding area where the car was. Arthur, could you wake the twins…inform them of the situation and send one of them to the joke shop. If Harry's in trouble….he might go there. Then you can join the search…but try and keep this quiet and don't raise too much suspicion. We don't want Death Eaters to be alerted to any problem or pick up on Harry's disappearance if they're not somehow involved," ordered Remus as his voice became steadier and he took control of the situation.

Molly looked around as her two oldest boys nodded and whipped out of the room and headed off to join the search. 

"Molly, I need you to stay here. If Harry's in trouble or hurt…he may try to Apparate here……And I'm sure you'll need to deal with Ron when he wakes," Remus voice trailed off as he fastened his cloak and strode over to Molly and gave her a quick squeeze before Apparating away.  
--------------------------------- ---------------------------  
A sliver of sunlight broke through the slit in the curtains and shown on the freckled face of Ron Weasley. Groaning, Ron turned over on his stomach and dug his face deeper into the pillows and tried to fall back asleep. But now that he was awake he could hear the goul in the attic banging on the pipes and he knew that any chance of him falling back asleep was gone.  
Not lifting his head from his pillow, Ron reached his arm off the edge of his bed and groped around on the floor for a t-shirt. Finding the crumpled t-shirt he had discarded prior to falling into bed last night, he grabbed it and ripped it over his head, and then stood up and stretched his long tired limbs and yawned.

Still wiping the sleep from his eyes, Ron pushed open the door to his upstairs bedroom and made his way down the winding stairs, sniffing the air for a clue to what his mom was preparing for breakfast. Almost halfway down the stairs Ron noticed that the smell of bacon or eggs did not reach his nose. That was odd. It had to be almost nine o'clock in the morning and with all the boys home for the summer, breakfast should have been prepared ages ago. 'Maybe I missed it?' he thought to himself as he continued down the stairs and into the quiet kitchen.

His mother was sitting at a chair in the middle of the long kitchen table. She was holding a mug in her hands and her head was bowed.She was still in her flannel nightshirt and her hair was still in the curlers that she wore to bed each night. Something wasn't right. Ron wasn't sure she was awake or not, so as he entered the kitchen he cleared his throat.

Molly Weasley's head snapped up at the sound of someone entering the room and Ron stopped in his tracks at the sight his mothers face. Her cheeks were blotchy and tearstained and her eyes were irritated-looking and red-rimmed. It looked as though she had not been asleep and very obviously had been crying about something. Ron was worried about what had brought on his mother's current state, and he was very afraid to ask, dreading that something terrible had happened to a brother or his dad.

"Mum?" he questioned while taking a step closer to his mother.

"Oh Ronald," she said forcing a smile onto her face and quickly getting up and taking her mug to the sink, "I must have fallen sleep. Breakfast will be up in a bit." She summoned various pans and some fresh eggs from their proper places and hastily started busying herself with breakfast. But as she made breakfast, she appeared shaken. She cracked several eggs with her wand, and missed the bowl, sending the contents crashing to the floor.

Something was definately not right and Ron wasn't buying his mother's excuse that she had fallen sleep. Ron strode over to his mum and grabbed a rag, bending down beside her to clean up the smashed egg yolk. Her hands were shaking as she clumbsily tried to clean up the mess. Ron could hear her sniffling and knew that she was crying.

"Mum? What happened?" he asked softly, ceasing his efforts to clean up the egg mess.  
She didn't seem to hear his question and commenced on scrubbing the floor even harder with the rag. Ron grabbed her hands and pulled them towards him, forcing her to stop and to look at him.

"Something's wrong...Who is it?" he asked a bit more firmly. Since the war started a few years ago, Ron had gotten used to asking "who" rather than "what" when it came to bad news.

"Ron," Molly whispered quietly while taking his wrist in her hand and standing up, "you need to sit down." He gave her a worried look and stood up. He was more than a head and a half taller than her and he felt awkward as his mother led him over to the table and sat him down. She then seated herself opposite him and placed her hands on the table, clasping them with his.

"Please tell me it's not Dad? I thought he was home last night? It couldn't be Bill or Charlie...I stayed up with them until almost midnight playing chess. Oh no! Who is it?Fred or George?" Ron cried out breathlessly.

"Ron," Molly said softly.

"It wasn't Professor Lupin was it. I know Harry said something about a misson with werewolves...but it wasn't a full moon last night and..." Ron rambled on while ignoring his mother's silent pleas to listen to her.

"Mom? It's not Hermione is it?" He asked with tears in his eyes. "I knew we shouldn't have left Harry's. I knew it was dangerous for her to stay with her parents..."

"Ron!" Molly shouted. Ron stopped and stared at his mother. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, willing her mind to be able to explain last nights events to him.

"Ron, last night Remus called on us through Floo just as I was about to tuck in for the night," she took another deep breathe and tried to decide the best way to go about explaining things.

"And?"

"And Tonks and the Aurors who were assigned to Harry came back last night to report that they had had problems with the Dursleys..." Molly paused as she looked at her son across from her.

Ron scrunched his face as if he were thinking. "Oh yeah...Harry had that muggle wedding with those relatives of his. What was the problem? Harry didn't do some accidental magic on them, did he? Though I have to admit those muggles deserve anything Harry throws at them. What'd he do? Blow someone up? Give Dudley a snout to go along with that tail of his? Don't tell me the Ministry is putting up a fit over him doing magic. What'd they do? They didn't come and snap his wand, did they? Don't tell me he's got to go on trial again?"

Molly shook her head. Ron wasn't understanding and she didn't have the heart to tell him that his best friend was missing and feared kidnapped or killed by Death Eaters.

"No Ron. They were on their way back from the wedding when they lost the car in fog. When the Aurors finally located the car they followed it, but when it was time to turn into Little Whinging, the car went on and it turns out that it wasn't the Dursley's car. They went and searched at Privet Drive, and tried to contact Harry...but no one knows were he or the Dursley's are. They never came home and the whole Order is worried because Harry didn't have his wand." Molly stopped when she saw Ron's eyes go wide and his Adam's Apple bob up and down as he swallowed.

"He's missing?" Ron said in a dead voice.

Molly nodded and squeezed her son's hands harder.

"How long has he been gone? Has there been any word yet?" Ron said in a strangled voice, staring at a spot on the table.

"It was early this morning when Remus called and it's been since a little before one this morning when they saw the Dursley's car. I'm sorry I didn't wake you up Ron...I just hoped we'd have heard something before. But there hasn't been any news...good or bad," Molly choked through a fresh wave of tears.

A million scenarios began playing through Ron's mind. Horrible scenes of Harry being tortured by Death Eaters and of Voldemort sending the Killing Curse towards a shocked Harry played through his head like a bad film strip. No. He had to find Harry. Ron and Hermione were the only people that Harry had confided the contents of the prophecy to. He knew what the implications of Harry's death meant for the world. If Harry was dead, that was it, there would be no future for anyone. Voldemort would prevail and the world would become dark and evil. 

But that didn't matter to Ron right now. If Harry was dead, it didn't matter if Voldemort ruled and hunted down those fighting against him. Harry's death meant that he'd lost a best friend, a brother. Harry's death meant that Ginny would lose her true love and a chance at a happy future together. His parents would lose a boy they throught of as a son. And the world would lose a great wizard and a good man. No. He had to find him.

Ron yanked his hand from his mother's grasp and stood up, causing the chair to clatter to the ground behind him. He whipped around and hurried upstairs to his room. Tossing off his dirty t-shirt, he pulled on a jumper and a clean pair of jeans and grabbed his cloak from the doorhandle and tossed it into a knapsack. Searching through the drawers of his dresser, Ron tossed the few coins he had and a small dagger his grandfather had given him for his seventeen birthday into the knapsack as well. He slung the pack around his shoulders and tugged on his socks and trainers. He then reached under his bed, pulled out his Cleansweep and strode out onto the stair landing and made his way downstairs.

"Ron! Where do you think you're going?" his mother cried as he entered the kitchen.

"Where the bloody hell do you think I'm going? My best friend is missing; you don't expect me to sit here and twiddle my thumbs, waiting to hear if they found his body or not?" snapped Ron as he made his way toward the door.

Molly moved in front of her son and tried to block his way. He was much bigger than her and if he wanted to he could just push her out of the way.

"Mum...move." Ron ordered threateningly while readjusting the pack on his back.

"No. Ronald Weasley you're going to stay here," Molly shrieked, her emotions finally getting the best of her. The strain of having a family so involved in the Order and the war rose to the surface. "I'm not going to allow you to go running out there by yourself. You don't even know where to look or what or who could be there if you find him. I'm may not be able to stop your father or brothers from going, but you're not a member of the Order and while you still live under my roof, you'll listen to what I have to say."

"NO! He's my best friend...he's my brother and I'm not going to sit here and do nothing. If I was in trouble...Harry'd be out there right now, risking his life to find me," Ron shouted. His face was set with a fierce look of determination and passion for his best friend. For a moment, Molly couldn't help but be proud of her son. He was more brave and loyal to Harry and to his friends than she had ever known anyone to be, but she couldn't let him go out into the world alone and unaided.

"Ron," she said a bit more soothingly, "every member of the Order is looking for him. If you leave now and someone comes back with news, any news, we won't know where to find you. And if Harry is in trouble and captured...who's to say you couldn't be too. We need to notify the Order if you're leaving and they're all spread out now. When someone checks in...I promise you...you can go and look with the Order. But I'm not allowing you to go off by yourself. Ron...Harry wouldn't want you to risk your safety...you know that."

Ron let the broom that he had propped over his shoulder clatter to the ground and his head fell to his chest.

"You're right Mum. I wouldn't know where to look for him...I'm just so...so scared for him. He wouldn't want anyone to risk their lives for him...he hates it when people do that. But he needs us to help him...now more than ever. I just don't want to lose him," Ron said quietly through tears.

"I know Ron," She said as she embraced him and ruffled up his hair as he laid his head on her shoulder, quietly sobbing. Molly was saddened even deeper as she stood in the middle of the kitchen with her seventeen year old son crying on her shoulder. Her children had seen so much and had things put on their shoulders that no grown adult should have to endure. She was proud of how all of her children had held themselves through all the uncertainty and dark times. But maybe it was beginning to be too much.

She knew that Ron, Hermione, and especially Harry were all more involved in all of this than they ever let on. There was something going on between the three of them. She had felt it when she had arrived at the hospital wing at Hogwarts the night of Dumbledore's death and as she watched them converse after the funeral a few days later. They had seemed closer, more determined, and more mature than she had ever seen those three be. And her feelings were reaffirmed when Ron had informed the family he would be spending the summer, until the wedding, with Harry and Hermione at Privet Drive. 

It worried her constantly to think that Ron's fate was so closely knit with Harry's. Ron was Harry's best friend and Harry was The Boy-Who-Lived. He was the prime target of Lord Voldemort. And he was, according to the press, The Chosen One. Harry was supposedly the only one who could and who was destined to, vanquish Lord Voldemort from existence.  
Molly didn't know if what the papers said were true and she hadn't heard the prophecy's contents. But somehow she knew, though her heart hoped it not true, that Harry would be the one to finally rid the world of Voldemort. If it was destiny or redemption that would be driving him...she didn't know. But the fact that Ron and Hermione would follow Harry wherever to the end is what scared her. It was what had her up into the wee hours of the morning. They were no longer children, they hadn't been for a long time, and it pained her to see them robbed of the freedoms of their teenage years.

Ron lifted his head from his mother's shoulders and took a deep sigh.

"I have to go let Hermione know," his voice cracked quietly.

"Ron...an owl's probably not a good thing. She needs to know...I agree. But we should have someone Apparate over and get her. We'll need a member of the Order, so we'll just have to wait for that too," she said bracingly, waiting for an angry protest from Ron.

"Yeah...you're right. I just hate that I can't even tell her that one of her friends is missing.It's just not fair...none of it," sighed Ron sadly as he sat down at the table again.

Molly nodded and patted Ron on the back as she went over to the stove and started making some tea. After putting the kettle on to boil, she turned back to her son, who was still sitting at the table, his head back, and his eyes closed. She went back to fussing over the kettle and got out two cups.

Taking the kettle off of the stove, Molly poured tea into the two cups, filling one with milk and honey and one with just milk. She brought the two cups over to the table and sat across from Ron, who had leaned forward and had another look of horror on his face.

"Ron...what is it?"

"Ginny...was she up already this morning?"  
"No."

"I need to tell her."

"Ron...I can tell her when she's up.." but Ron cut her off.

"No...I need to tell her. She's my sister, I'm his best mate, It needs to come from me." 

Molly nodded and watched her youngest son get up from the table and head up the stairs. She had forgotten about Ginny.


	3. Chapter 3: Fighting and Failing

Thud... 

Charging...come on kid...clear...

Thud...thud...

Again...charging...

Thud...thud...t hud...

Once more...you're not dying...not today...clear!

Thump...thump...thump. ...thump...thump...

God damn...he's back. Push another round of Eppy and call down a surgeon. He's losing blood fast...if we don't get this kid up to the operating room soon we're not going to be able to get him back again.

How long had he been down?

Ten minutes...this time. Paramedics said he was down in the field for a bit longer...they even pronounced him on scene... 

CT showed some bleeding in the brain too...Hope there's enough of this kid left to save...damn shame...

Harry could hear voices all around him. Were they talking about him? The last thing Harry remembered was lying in the grass and people screaming at him to hang on, while he wanted so badly just to sleep and slip into the darkness. Now he could hear people talking about surgery and bleeding. 'I'm alive' he thought to himself, 'If they're trying to save me I'm alive!"

He wanted to open his eyes to see if this was real and it wasn't death playing cruel tricks on him. But his eyes and body felt so heavy and he hurt so badly. He could hear people moving all around him, turning him over and prodding him with their hands and God knows what. Every time they touched him or moved him in the slightest, his body throbbed with pain and he wanted to scream out.

He tried to make a groan or any sound that would catch their attention, but there was something in his mouth that prevented the sound from escaping. He could feel a hand searching his left arm for something. 'They must be looking for a vein or something.' he thought to himself. He wanted desperately to get someone's attention, to tell them that he was still here and he was aware. He focused all his attention on his left hand, forcing his fingers to move or twitch...or do something.

"Marie, come take a look at this," said a female voice from beside him. Harry tried moving his hand again. 'Maybe they had noticed' he thought to himself.

"It's most likely spasms or tremors. This kid's been through hell...Dr. Harris didn't sound too optimistic about his chances of function and recovery from injuries like this, " came an older female voice from farther away.

"He wasn't doing that before. In fact, there was no response to any stimuli before. You don't think..." the first voice quietly stated as she trailed off at mid-sentence.

"What's the name on the chart?" asked the older voice.

"Harry...yes...no last name though."

Harry felt a warm hand slip into his.

"Harry, my name is Marie. If you can hear me squeeze my hand dear," came a soft voice in his ear. He had to let them know he was here...that he wasn't brain damaged. At least he felt like he was all there, he just couldn't get his body to respond. So he focused all his attention on squeezing his left hand. He felt his own hand push against another and heard an audible gasp from the women who was holding his hand.

"Carol, go get Dr. Harris...now!" Harry heard hurried footsteps leaving the room and echoing down a hall.

"Harry...I know it hurts and I know you're scared but if you can, open your eyes for me," soothed the older woman who was now stroking the top of his hand, trying to get him to respond. He wanted to badly to open his eyes and to see that he wasn't dreaming and to affirm that he was still alive. He struggled, focusing all his strength on just getting his eyelids to open. He felt them flutter and a flash of a bright light forced him to squint to stop the glare from hurting his eyes.

"There we go. Can you try again?" the woman asked. Harry tried desperately again and his eyes fluttered open and he tried to focus on the room, but without his glasses everything was a blur of white and lights. The soft, round-faced outline of a middle aged woman swam into Harry's view and he wanted to cry out in happiness...he was alive, it wasn't a trick. But whatever was in his mouth prevented him once again from making any noise and instead there was an odd coughing and sputtering noise and a burning sensation in his chest.

"It's ok Harry. We had to put a tube down your throat to help you breathe, you punctured your lung and were having trouble breathing by yourself, so don't try to talk. Just relax and let the ventilator do it for you ok?" the woman said soothingly as she started taking a wet cloth and cleaning the blood off his forehead and around his eyes. Hurried footsteps could be heard entering the room and a man with blonde hair came into Harry's blurry field of vision.

"Harry, my name is Doctor Neil Harris and I'm an attending physician here at St. Thomas Hospital. Do you remember being in a car crash?" the doctor asked while leaning over Harry. He wanted to answer 'yes' but the ventilator didn't allow him to talk and when he tried to nod he found his neck sore and immobilized. The doctor though picked up on Harry's body language and gave a nod.

"You were pretty badly hurt in the accident Harry and you arrived here about an hour ago by air transport. You gave us a right scare at first and we had to shock you to get you back...," stated the doctor as he shined a bright light in each of Harry's eyes and turned to the nurse and said, "Pupils are equal and reactive."

"You need to hang with us a bit longer though mate...you're not out of the woods yet. You're still bleeding and we need to get you up to surgery to patch you up and make sure you're not hurt anymore than we can see, ok? We need to go as quick as we can... you hit your head pretty hard and we took a picture of your skull when you first got here.We found some evidence of an injury and bleeding...so we need to fix that up too. But it's good sign though that you're alert and awake right now kid...we were pretty scared for a second. Right now I just need you to stay awake and keep fighting. We're just waiting for the go ahead from the surgeons to head on up."

'Surgery?' Harry's mind started racing. 'No...Those Muggle nutters are going to cut me open and dig around inside me. They're going to open my head up and probably take part of my brain out or something.' Harry started frantically thinking of a way he could stop them. He'd get them to contact the Order or something...surely Healers at St. Mungo's could patch him up in a jiffy. There was no way he was going to let some Muggle doctor perform surgery on him.

Harry started focusing on moving his body, thrashing around and trying to get them to stop. But all he succeeded in doing was moving his neck a bit and make his hand twitch. He was so tired and every time he moved a stab of pain enveloped his entire body. An alarm on one of the monitors softly beeping in the background started to sound. The women's voice, Marie, sounded as she pressed a button on the haywire monitor.

"We need you to relax son...we're doing everything to help you...but you need to relax. Ok?" The nurse turned to the doctor and Harry could hear her whisper, "Oxygen levels and blood pressure are both dropping and I've got blood a lot of blood in this chest tube...we need to go now."

A sudden, sharp stabbing pain in his chest caused Harry to close his eyes and clamp them tight in pain. The darkness that had taken him earlier was threatening again and he found it impossible to hang on any longer. He could hear faint yells and shouts around him as more people entered the room. But their voices soon started to fade until he could hear them no longer.

Damn...there's blood in the chest tube...lots of it...

Bleeding in the chest...blunt trauma...aorta...

Get surgery down...crack his chest...internal paddles...

What else? Hang on kid...

------------------------------ ---------------------------------------- ------------------------  
Ron stood on the landing outside of his younger sister's bed room, staring at her closed door. He'd just found out that Harry was missing and had told his mother that he would break the bad news to Ginny. Now that he was here, he wished he hadn't have felt a sense of duty to do it.

How would she react? She had been going out with Harry, but they were broken up now. But she still cared deeply for him and would always hold a special place in here heart for him. Ron wasn't sure how he'd react around a hysteric or crying Ginny. And there was always the chance she would react the same way he had, and start planning a hastily planned rescue mission.

Sighing, Ron knocked softly on her door. There was no reply. He knocked again, a bit harder. Again, there was no answer. Fearing that Ginny was gone and maybe she and Harry had been part of an elaborate kidnapping plan by the Death Eaters, he pushed open her bedroom door.

Ginny was sitting in the window seat, still in her pajamas. She looked as though she was staring out into the soft morning light, but her eyes were closed and Ron could see that her cheeks were stained with tears.

"Gin?" he whispered softly. Ginny started and looked over at Ron who was silhouetted in the doorframe.

"Sorry Ron...I guess I didn't hear you," she stammered quickly, hastily wiping the tears from her face.

Ron opened his mouth to speak, but then closed it, afraid to tell her.

"Gin, there's something we need to talk about."

Ginny shook her head and turned her attention back out the window.

"No Ron. I already know," she said in a quiet and shaky voice.

"You know? How?" Ron stuttered incredulously.

"Last night I was on my way to the loo when I heard Bill and Dad's voice coming from downstairs. I snuck down to the kitchen and listened from there," Ginny stopped and continued to stare out the window. She didn't make to talk or explain any more.

Ron's stomach sank and he made his way over to the window and plopped down on the floor beside her. That was not the way he would have wanted her to find out. She had obviously been up all night, alone, and worrying about Harry.

"Gin I'm sorry..." he started, but she cut him off.

"Has there been any news?" she asked sharply.

Ron shook his head and looked down at the floor. Ginny gave a deep shudder and brought her hands to her head, cradling them. Ron got up from the floor and sat down next to her on the window seat and putting his arm around her, he drew her now sobbing form in closer to him. He was desperately searching for any words that would comfort her fears and perhaps comfort him too.

"We're going to get through this," he choked as the damn frustration of fears broke and tears cascaded down his own face, "We're going to find him and everything will be ok. We've been in this situation before and things always work out. This is Harry we're talking about and we both know he always comes through these things, somehow. I know he's fighting like hell to get back to us...he's going to come home again...I know it."

"Something just doesn't feel right Ron. This time... is different and I'm just so scared..." she whimpered.

Ron nodded. She was right. All of the other times Harry had been in danger or missing, like at the Tri-Wizard Tournament, he'd been sick with worry. But he'd been able to ward off his worry and tell himself that Harry would be fine. This time there was a dark whole in his stomach that was filling him with dread and he couldn't make it go away. And no matter the number of reassurances or comforting thoughts he tried to fill the void with, things didn't feel right. Harry was wand less, he hadn't tried to contact them, and there had been no news since his disappearance. Things were definitely not right.

The two of them sat in silence for a while, thinking to themselves and worrying that every minute that Harry was gone, the farther hope of a happy ending was slipping away.  
Not being able to stand the silence, Ron gave a deep sigh and stood up.

"Ginny, let's go downstairs and have some tea. Mum's down there in a right state and we can wait together," he said holding out his hand to her. She smiled softly at him and took his hand.

She followed him out the door and the two of them made their way down the rickety and winding stairs. When they were almost to the bottom landing, the sound of their mother's rushed and worried voice and their father's quiet tones could be heard from the kitchen. Ron stopped and pulled Ginny behind him; the two of them pressed their backs against the wall and strained to listen to the conversation. They both knew that even though they were considered mature and even adults in many aspects, the moment they stepped into the kitchen, their parents would clam up and hide things from them to protect them. So they both stood on the stairs above the landing listening and trying not to make a sound.  
-------------------------------- ---------------------------------------- -------------  
"Arthur, have they found him yet?" asked Molly apprehensively as her husband righted himself and dusted the ash off of his worn traveling cloak.

Arthur looked sadly at his wife and shook his head.

"You can't tell me there hasn't been any sign, no trace of anything yet. Certainly the Ministry would have been alerted to magic use in Muggle areas. They would have been alerted to any strange activity outside of wizarding communities and could have detected Death Eater activity." She ranted, trying to keep her voice down, but the distress in her voice made that hard.

Arthur made his way to the table and sat down, bowing his head and closing his eyes before speaking.

"Molly. You're right. They would have been able to detect magic in that area. It would have been highly unusual and would have alerted them right away," He paused while rubbing the palm of his hand against his tired eyes, "That's why we don't think it was the Death Eaters or You-Know-Who at all."

"What?" cried Molly exasperatedly

Arthur raised his head and took a deep breath and letting it out before continuing. This was surely going to upset Molly.

"We searched the highway and the surrounding area, trying to find any sign of the car or anyone. We traced the road at least ten times and couldn't see anything because it was still so dark out and damn foggy. Just as the sun was rising Alastor noticed a bent guardrail that was only visible because of the light. So we decided to fly down and check it out. When we landed we saw that there were ruts in the grass and signs that a car, several vehicles in fact had driven down that area," Arthur paused and took a drink of the tea that Molly had set on the table as she sat down next to him and took his hand.

"We followed the tracks down a steep embankment and into a wooded area. The farther down the hill we got...the more rutted and beat up the ground was. We reached a little clearing and there was a few cop cars surrounding the area...checking out the scene. And...," he stopped and shuddered, "the Dursley's car was there."

"Arthur?" whispered Molly in a frightened voice as she watched her husband's eyes well up with tears.

"It was crushed up against a tree...turned upside down. It had obviously broke through the guard rail and flipped down the hill before it hit the tree," Arthur stopped when his wife let out a gasp and clutched his hand even harder, "Molly...I don't know...I don't know how anyone survived that. The way the car looked and there was so much...so much blood on the ground and in the car."

Tears began to fall down Molly's cheeks as she asked, "Do you know if there were any survivors? Do we know anything more about the accident?"

Arthur nodded slowly as he fought to keep the tears from falling down his own face. This was going to be hard for her to take.

"We had Hawkins act as a Muggle Officer. She went around the scene...trying to get information from the police reports and asking the officers investigating the scene questions… Vernon and Petunia Dursley were declared dead on the scene," Molly let out a quiet intake of breath, "The report also said that two teens were treated on the scene and then taken to a local hospital. One was a female, Dudley's girlfriend, Sara Grantman…the other…the other one was male and…and was Dudley."

"What about…" Molly interrupted, but Arthur held up his hand and continued.

"The only other information was that the other passenger had been ejected from the car. There was no name on the report….but...but the description was of a white male, between the ages of 16-20. The report said that they...that he…that the passenger was pronounced de...dead shortly after the arrival of the emergency workers."

"NO!" cried several voices in unison. A loud thump could be heard from the landing just outside the kitchen.

"GINNY!" cried Ron's voice.

Molly and Arthur both rose from their seats and hurried over to the landing just up the stairs to find Ron leaning against the wall holding an unconscious Ginny in his arms.

Arthur's heart sank and his stomach lurched. 'Oh dear God,' thought Arthur,'they were listening on the stairs. They heard everything.'

"Dad?" whimpered Ron as he looked up at his father with wide-fearful, tear-filled eyes.

Arthur looked at his son hurt and confused son and couldn't find any words.

"Ron...give her to me." whispered Molly as she crossed her stunned looking husband and reached out to take Ginny from Ron's arms, noticing he was trembling all over.

Ron stood up and started breathing deeply through his nose and mouth, trying to compose himself and stop the rush of tears from cascading down his face.

"Ron," said his father while reaching out his arm to the boy "come here."

"NO!" Ron shouted as he jerked out of his fathers reach and held his arms closer to his body.

"Ron we need to talk..." urged his father, taking a step closer to Ron.

"No...No...No...NO! You're not going to tell me that a bloody--fucking--car crash killed Harry Potter. You're not going to tell me my best friend is gone! Harry's not dead... It's not true...it's not possible...HE'S NOT GONE!!!!" screamed Ron at the top of his lungs. Ron was hysterical. His whole body was shaking and he broke into a torrent of body-wracking sobs that were punctuated by cries of "NO!" and "HE'S NOT GONE."

Arthur rushed forward and enveloped Ron in a forced embrace. Ron struggled in his grief, flailing his limbs all around and trying desperately to push himself away from his father who was now holding him fast to him. After a few seconds of struggling, Ron slumped onto his father and continued to sob continuously onto his father's shoulders. Tears were now running down Arthur's face and Molly was struggling to revive a still unconscious Ginny.

"I'm going to take her upstairs to her room," croaked Molly through her tears. Arthur nodded in acknowledgement and continued to hold his son. Molly lifted the pale and small frame of her youngest daughter and set up the stairs to her bedroom.

Ron silently sobbed into his father's shoulder for a few minutes, not looking up or letting go in the least. Arthur suddenly felt Ron shudder and looked down to see his son looking up at him.

"I don't get how...how he died. Why he didn't use magic. He should have been able to save himself. He's a bloody wizard...wizard's don't die in car crashes," Ron pleaded to his father, sounding like a confused five-year old.

"I don't know how it happened or why it happened son. When we heard he was missing, we never in a million years thought that this was why...We assumed it was You-Know-Who's workings and he'd been captured by the Death Eaters or something. Why he didn't use magic...I can't tell you Ron. He didn't have his wand...true...but I thought the same as you, that he could have done something...even accidental magic to prevent this. But he could have been scared or asleep and he might not have had time. Things like this happen...accidents happen and we can't explain them...we can't prepare for them...they just happen," choked Arthur as he continued to hold the lost seventeen year old in his arms.

There was a long silence and Ron sat in his father's lap, letting his father's words soak into his clouded, grief-filled mind.

"I feel like I failed him," whispered Ron.

Arthur took his son by the shoulders and forced him to look at him.

"Ron...don't for a minute feel like you failed him...like it's your fault somehow," pleaded Arthur.

"But we left him. We were planning on staying till Bill's wedding, but he insisted we come home and spend time with our families. I should have fought harder to stay. I told him that it was no problem...but he didn't want to subject us to those awful relatives of his any longer. When he sent us that letter telling us about the wedding...I should have asked him to tag along. But he sounded like he was looking forward to it. He always wanted to do something with the Dursley's, like a family or something and I didn't want to ruin that chance. I should have..." but Ron trailed off and the tears started to fall again.

"You couldn't have foreseen this any more than the rest of us. It wouldn't have mattered if you had stayed...we'd probably have lost you too," said Arthur.

"But if Hermione and I were..."Ron trailed off and let out a groan.

"What?"

"Hermione. She doesn't know. She doesn't even know he was missing. Mom and I were waiting for a member of the Order to come back with news so we could go tell Hermione," Ron got up from his father's embrace, "I have to go over there and tell her. I don't want her hearing this from anyone else."

"I'm coming with you Ron," stated Arthur, taking Ron in his arms again. This time Ron embraced him willingly. "You're not doing this alone. We're going to get through this as a family. I promise you."

"Thanks Dad," replied Ron in a raspy voice.

Arthur grabbed his and Ron's cloaks from their spots next to the door and handed it over to his son who was studying the floor with his eyes.

"Dad...they didn't...they haven't found his...him yet?" asked Ron, not looking up.

"No. We don't know where they took him. The report said that Dudley and his girlfriend were taken to a hospital to be treated for non-life threatening injuries...but we don't know where. The Order is searching local hospitals, trying to find information. We're trying to find Dudley...see if he can't tell us more. But it's a slow go so far. We're trying to be as inconspicuous as possible...we don't want to alert Death Eaters or spies of any problems until we can be sure of things. We're trying to minimize magic use and methods to avoid detection," explained Arthur.

"They don't even...even know where his body is?" Ron moaned softly. Arthur put a comforting hand on his son's shoulder.

"No. But I promise you...Ron...I want to believe as much as you that this isn't true and that we've made a huge mistake...but I promise we'll find him. No matter the circumstances or the outcome, we will bring him home where he belongs...we won't stop until we find him," assured Mr. Weasley.

Ron gave an understanding nod of his head and swallowed hard as he and his father stepped outside and Apparated to the Granger's.

-------------------------- ---------------------------------------- -----------

With a soft 'pop', the two tall, red-headed Weasley men stepped out of side street and onto the avenue that held the Granger's two-story, suburban home. Ron led the way, fighting his nerves and his grief as he strode down the sidewalk.

Upon reaching the last house on the street, he strode up the front walk and up the small porch, stopping and staring at the closed door, afraid to knock or alert anyone to his presence. Mr. Weasley followed up closely behind his son, placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

"Ron you don't have to do this...I can," but he was cut off when Ron shook his head fiercely. Ron reached his hand up and knocked lightly on the oak door. He heard the sound of someone moving inside and saw Mrs. Granger's reflecting through the stained glass window on one side of the door.

"Hello," greeted Mrs. Granger, surveying her two guests, "Ron! How nice to see you again. And Arthur, how are you doing? My, it's been a while..."

"May I speak to Hermione?" Ron interrupted in a strained voice.

Mrs. Granger eyed him with concern. "She's not in at the moment. She went to lunch with her cousin and aunt who are in town this week from America. She'll be back though in a bit, probably in a half-hour or so. I can tell her you stopped by and I'll have her call on you later."

"No. If it's alright with you, I'd like to wait for her to come home. I need to talk to her," Ron pressed.

"Sure...Come on in," said Mrs. Granger, starting to sense something was wrong. She opened the door wider and allowed the two men to step into the foyer. "We can go in the sitting room if that's alright with you. Would you like some tea?"

Ron shook his head and continued into the sitting room.

"Yes, tea would be nice," Mr. Weasley answered, giving Mrs. Granger half-hearted smile.

"Arthur, what's wrong? What's happened," she whispered in a worried voice.

"Is Robert home?" asked Mr. Weasley, inquiring about Mr. Granger.

"Yes...he's up in his office just doing some paperwork," answered Mrs. Granger.

"I think it would be best if you two joined us in the sitting room," requested Mr. Weasley.

"Ok...I guess I'll call him down," the worry on Mrs. Granger was evident and she was scared about how Arthur and Ron were acting. Something was not right.

Mrs. Granger climbed the stairs and Mr. Weasley could hear her calling to her husband. She came back down the stairs, "He'll be joining us in a moment. What's this about?"

Mr. Weasley just shook his head and gestured to the sitting room. The two adults walked into the small room to find Ron sitting in a corner chair with his head in his hands. Mr. Weasley stepped behind the chair and stood behind Ron, rubbing his shoulders to try and comfort him a bit.

Footsteps could be heard coming down the stairs and the tall, strong figure of Robert Granger appeared in the sitting room doorway.

"Arthur, Ron...How good to see you both again. What brings you here today?" greeted Mr. Granger enthusiastically.

"Um...perhaps you should both sit down," Mr. Weasley offered. Mr. and Mrs. Granger both looked at each other and sat down next to each other on a small sofa, waiting intently for Mr. Weasley or Ron to speak. Something was very wrong.

Arthur closed his eyes and steeled himself for the second time today to deliver the horrible news.

"Last night, we recieved an urgent call via Floo, you've heard of this? Yes? We learned that a car carrying Harry Potter and his relatives was missing. They had attending a wedding out in the countryside and were returning home early this morning. We sent out a search party and started covering every possible area. This morning we found evidence that the car that they had been travelling in had crashed. When we got there, the police, your police, were investigating the scene," said Mr. Weasley as he tried to retell the circumstances.

"A crash? Is Harry alright?" asked Mr. Granger, obviously concerned. Mr. Weasley shook his head.

"How badly is he hurt? Is he going to...to make it?" Mrs. Granger wondered aloud. 'Certainly these two would not have come if this was nothing serious. They'd have contact Hermione through an owl or something else,' she thought gravely to herself.

"Jane," started Mr. Weasley turning to Mrs. Granger, "Harry..."

"Harry's dead Mrs. Granger," stated Ron in a hollow voice. Both Mr. and Mrs. Granger looked at Ron, their faced horrified. Mrs. Granger looked as though she was going to be ill.

"Dead?" repeated Mr. Granger unbelievingly. Mrs. Granger leapt out of her seat next to her husband and pulled Ron into a bone-crushing hug.

"Ron I'm so sorry...I'm so sorry," she spoke soothingly as she began to cry silently into his hair. Ron once again broke down into body-wracking sobs and clung to Mrs. Granger.

Mr. Granger hung his head and brought his hand to his face, closing his eyes and trying to take everything in.

"I'm so sorry Arthur. I just don't believe it. After all the boy has been through...now this?" Mr. Granger said through his hands. "God.How are we supposed to tell Hermione?"

Ron looked up from Mrs. Granger's shoulder.

"I'll tell her. We lost our best friend...our brother. I just want to be with her...to be there."

Mr. Granger strode over to his wife and Ron and placed a soothing hand on the young man's shoulder.

"We'll do this together. You both don't need to go through this alone...we're here."

Ron nodded and took his sleeve to try and dry the tears that were wetting his face. He'd cried more tears than he had ever before in his life. But there was no point in holding back anymore. Harry was gone and there was a big whole in his heart, in his soul.

Mrs. Granger gave him a pat on the shoulder and handed him some tissues, which Ron took with a small smile and started to clean his face off.

"I'm just going to go start some tea, ok?" And Jane Granger stood up and slowly made her way to the kitchen.

Mr. Granger retreated to the two vacant chairs and were having a conversation, undoubtedly about Harry and the accident. Ron just sat there, breathing shakily and staring off into space. He glanced at the clock and noticed that they had been at the Granger's for about twenty-five minutes. That meant that Hermione was going to be home soon and he'd have to steel himself to tell her. She would be heartbroken and like him, she would have a hard time believing or fathoming that Harry was dead.

At that thought, there was a noise at the door and happy female voices, deep in gossipy conversation could be heard coming from the front hall.

"Mom! We're back. I took Aunt Laurie and Kara to that new Italian bistro down on Sullivan Street and it was wonderful. When Ron and Harry come to visit next week, I've got to take them. Ron will love it. They've got these huge portions and I'm sure Harry's never been allowed...," Hermione called out, "Mom?"

Mrs. Granger's distraught voice came from the kitchen.

"Hermione could you please go into the sitting room. Laurie and Kara could you watch the tea for me please?"

"Sure..." came Hermione's unsure voice. She walked into the sitting room with a few shopping bags and broke out into a huge grin when she saw Ron sitting in one of the chairs.

"Ron! What are you doing here? This is such a surprise. I didn't know...Ron what's wrong?" her grin faded as he looked up at her with sad, tear-filled eyes. His hair was a mess and he was definitely not alright. She looked around and saw that Mr. Weasley was also there, sitting on the sofa with her father.

"Mr. Weasley...Ron...What?" Hermione stuttered and stammered. Something was wrong. Why were both Mr. Weasley and Ron here? Ron wasn't due to come visit her till next week. Hermione's mother came up from behind her and put a hand on her shoulder.

Hermione looked around franticly; waiting for someone to speak and tell her what was going on. A deep, sick feeling of worry began to fill her stomach and she knew that they had horrible news. Ron didn't cry, and he had certainly been doing that.

"Hermione..."began Ron with a trembling voice, his mouth began to open and close like a fish out of water and he couldn't find the words or the heart to tell her. He couldn't look at her. He couldn't stand to see those searching eyes.

"Ron?" asked Hermione in a small, worry-filled voice. "What's wrong? Who is it?" she pleaded, her voice cracking and tears starting to fall from her eyes. 

"Ha…Harry. He...he's...Hermione he's gone," Ron cried, his heart breaking at every word.

Hermione looked at him with a look of incomprehension.

"Gone? Where?" she asked absentmindedly, staring at the floor and seemingly stunned. 

"No...Hermione...he's...he's...he's dead."

Hermione began to shake her head violently, tears streaming down her face and she kept repeating "no" over and over again, much like Ron had earlier.

"Hermione come here," Ron cried through tears as he got up and wrapped her up in his arms. She gave into him and started to hysterically sob into his chest. Ron let his own tears fall down his face and sat rubbing her back, knowing nothing he said would help or comfort anyone.

"How?" asked Hermione in a small voice, not looking up from Ron's chest.

"Coming back from that wedding. The Auror's lost the car in the fog and ended up following the wrong car, somehow," snapped Ron. A new found sense of anger flowed through Ron at the thought of the Auror's who couldn't keep track of the car, who hadn't been there to save his best friend. "They figured out it wasn't the car when they were almost back to Surrey. The Order was put on alert that he was missing...I'm sorry I couldn't tell you...they searched all morning for the car, for any sign of a struggle. This morning they found the Dursley's car. It was a total wreck and looked like it had crashed into a guard rail and flipped down a hill or something," Hermione let out a small gasp and Ron clutched her tighter.

"The Order members there tried to investigate...talk to the police and things like that. And that's how they found out...that he...that he was..." but Ron couldn't finish his sentence. He was sick of saying that Harry was dead, sick of hearing it.

"If the Muggle police knew..." started Hermione as her ever-anylizing brain began to kick in, "It wasn't Death Eaters...was it a..."

"A car crash...Yeah. No Death Eaters, no bloody You-Know-Who...just an accident," whispered Ron into her ear.

The two teens sat clutching each other, each lost and scared. The adults in the room put reassuring hands on the two as they broke down and grieved for their best friend.

"Ron...can we go up to my room?" asked Hermione through thick tears. Ron looked up at Mr. and Mrs. Granger for approval. Even though they were grieving, he wasn't sure he was allowed in Hermione's room. But they nodded and gave them a knowing smile.

"Sure," he whispered, bending down to kiss her forehead.

"Ron...I'm going to go home and see to your mom and Gin. If you need anything at all...don't hesitate..."Arthur Weasley said hesitantly.

"Thanks Dad," Ron whispered. Arthur Weasley walked out into the hall and a soft 'pop' could be heard as he Apparated home to his wife and daughter. Ron and Hermione, arm and arm, walked slowly up the stairs and down the hall into Hermione's room and closed the door softly behind them.


	4. Chapter 4: Filling in The Gaps

Chapter 4: Filling in the Gaps  
Arthur landed shakily on his feet just outside The Burrow. He looked sadly at the ramshackle house, knowing that right now, its usually happy atmosphere was wracked with grief and anguish over the loss of one of its own.

Pushing open the door, the figures of four red-haired men sitting around the table came into view, each of them lost in their own heads, unaware of his entrance. Bill was absentmindedly playing with his wand in his hand, staring off into nothingness. Charlie had his head bowed and his eyes were closed, apparently deep in thought. Fred was concentrating on his fingers that were tapping the table in a slow methodic rhythm. George was leaning back, his chair on two legs as he was focusing on the ceiling intently.

Mr. Weasley stopped to deposit his cloak on the hook next to the door, when Bill's voice punctuated the silence.

"Where's Ron?"

Arthur turned from the hooks and looked at his sons, who were now looking at him with tired and sad eyes.

"He's with Hermione. Those two need to be together," replied Arthur sadly. The boys all nodded in agreement.

"How are they?" Charlie asked softly.

Mr. Weasley shook his head.

"Not good. They're both taking it hard. Ron's trying to be strong for the both them...I don't think he knows what to do," said Mr. Weasley trailing off.

"I just can't believe it. It doesn't seem real...doesn't seem right," whispered Fred. Bill reached over and put a firm hand on Fred's shoulder. Fred looked at Bill with a look of appreciation and continued to stare at nothing in particular.

"I take it Remus sent you boys home?"Mr. Weasley inquired.

"Yeah. He said we should go home and be here for Mom, Gin and Ron. He and Mad-Eye and some of the other Order members are still searching hospitals and trying to find out something more. None of the hospitals within thirty or forty miles have any records of the crash, but it's still slow because of the limited use of magic.It happened out in the middle of nowhere and they could have been taken anywhere. I told Remus he should come with us...he's taken things pretty hard...but he wouldn't hear of it...wants to keep looking," Bill said with a shuddering breath.

"I can imagine he is. How's Gin...your mother?" 

"Mom's holding it together, but I think she's only doing it for Ginny. We got here right after Ginny came around and she was pretty hysterical. We...Charlie and I...we had to help hold her down to give her the Calming Draught and some Dreamless Sleep Potion. Mom's up with her now and keeping an eye on her," Bill said as his voice cracked with emotion.  
"How are you boys doing?"

"Trying to soak everything in...make sense of it," stated Charlie.

"I think we all are, son. We all are..."  
------------------------------ ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------- ---------  
Ron and Hermione both sat on the edge of her bed, holding each other and trying to find the right words to comfort themselves, but nothing seemed to help. Neither one of them was crying anymore, but they were silently staring into space, each of them lost in their own little worlds, only conscious of the fact that there was a gaping whole in their lives.

"Ron," Hermione whispered in a raspy voice, "we need to tell the Order about the Prophecy."  
"What?" cried Ron in a firm voice, pulling away from Hermione and looking at her with a wounded look. "Harry just died and all you can think about is that bloody prophecy?"

"Ron don't you think for a moment that I'm not hurting just as bad as you...or I somehow forgot the fact that our best friend is dead," accused Hermione in a hurt tone, "But Harry is dead...and there's nothing we can do about that. But without him...what happens? There is no one left to get rid of V-Voldemort. We have to tell the Order, and we have to prepare them for what's to come. When Voldemort finds out...he's going to have no one to stop him and he will be totally relentless. I can't bear to think what that means for us."

"NO! I promised Harry...you promised Harry that we would keep this a secret. We promised that we wouldn't tell anyone about the Prophecy or the Horcruxes...None of it! I'm not going back on my promise now...especially now. I'm not," cried Ron.

"I know what I promised. But things have changed and I never in a million years thought things would turn out this way and we'd have to decide or even consider this. But Ron, you have to think of our families and our friends that are still fighting. We need their help...we can't carry on Harry's fight by ourselves...we need to warn them and protect them from how horrible things can and will get now. Harry would want us to think about that. He'd want us to do what is right in order to save the people we love," whispered Hermione, running her hand through Ron's messy red hair.

Ron let out a long sigh and closed his eyes.

"They do need to know...but I'm not going to worry about that now. Right now I'm going to mourn for Harry...not the bloody Boy-Who-Lived or The Chosen One...but for my best mate...our best friend. I never thought I say that there were more pressing matters than a war to rid the world of Voldemort...but this is so much more important right now. After we find him and bring him home where he belongs...after the...the funeral and everything...we'll sit down and inform the Order that things just became a whole hell of a lot more complicated. But not until I've buryied my best friend...not until we've had time," said Ron passionately holding Hermione.

They sat for the next hour or so in each other's embrace, not saying a word.  
"Ron could you stay with me tonight? I don't want to be alone right now and I really need you to be here," whispered Hermione into Ron's ear.

"Yeah...whatever you want and however long you need me...I'll be here for you...for us. I just need to pop in at home and get some clothes and see how things are going...if there's any news," he said standing up and giving her a kiss on her forehead and Apparting back to the Burrow to his mourning family.  
------------------------------- ---------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------- -  
Ron landed softly outside the Burrow and slowly made his way up the cobbled path, past the chickens and old boots. He quietly pushed open the old door and entered the kitchen to find his older brothers as well as his father quietly talking, looking up when Ron shut the door behind him.

"Hey Ron," Bill offered quietly, giving his brother a soft smile.

"Hi," Ron replied shakily, "I just popped in to get some things. Hermione asked me stay with her and I guess i'm gonna stay over there for a while until...well I don't know how long." When nobody spoke, Ron gestured to the stairs. "Just gonna go up and get some nightclothes and some for tommorow and see how Mum and Gin are doing." The Weasley men watched as their youngest member made his way up the stairs, each at a loss of what to say to him.  
Ron made his way quickly to his room, careful not to linger too much on the picture frames and various school items on his walls or dresser. Tossing some t-shirts, jeans, and some pyjama bottoms in his school bag, he made his way to the end of the hall and knocked softly on Ginny's bedroom door.

"Yes?" came a quiet voice from the other side of the door. Ron pushed slowly pushed it open to find his mother sitting on a rocking chair next to his sister's bed. Ginny was lying still against the pillows, sleeping peacefully. But her face was covered with the remnants of tears and redness and her grief and hurt were obvious,despite her enchanted, dreamless sleep.

"Just wanted to see how you two were doing," said Ron quietly, "and I wanted to to let you know I'm going to stay with Hermione for a while."

"Oh Ron..." cried his mother, getting up from her chair and wrapping him up in a giant hug while sobbing uncontrollably on his chest."Ron I'm so sorry..."

"I know Mum..." Ron sobbed into his mother's hair as he patted her reassuradley on the back. When the tears had stopped flowing, Ron looked over at his sister lying unconscious on the bed. "Tell Gin when she wakes up that if she needs me or Hermione...well...you know where to find us. Take care of her...she needs us." Ron broke his embrace from his mother and left the room.

Down in the kitchen, the Weasley sons where in a quiet conversation, looking up when they heard the sqeak of the stairs that announced Ron's reentrance into the kitchen. At the same time, Arthur Weasley came into the kitchen from the sitting room, brushing soot from his robes.  
"Anything?" asked several of the Weasley's at the same time.

"Remus said that they were checking a small country hospital this afternoon and found out that Dudley and his girlfriend had both been treated there. Sara, the girl, was treated for minor cuts and bruises and some cracked ribs. And Dudley was treated for some bruising and a large laceration on his back. They were transferred to a hospital in London this morning. The records didn't indicate which one and Remus had to stop himself from performing magic to find out. He and Tonks are going to search the hospitals in London...but not till tommorow. I think I convinced him...actually Nymphandora convinced him...to get some rest. I don't think he can handle much more without breaking..." Arthur informed them.

"You think maybe we should go...we could get things done faster if the rest of the Order spread out?" asked George.

"No," answered Arthur softly. "There are things that we need to do. We still need to carry out the errands that Dumbledore had us working on and security and measures need to be taken to ensure Hogwarts can open again. There's far too few of us as it is...and I besides...I think Remus wants to...needs to do this for himself. We need to understand that Harry was the last link to his past...his friends...and I know he feels as if he's failed them somehow. As much as we're hurting and grieving, we need to respect his wishes and allow him to bring closure to this."

"No offense Dad...but Harry was like a brother to us, to all of us and right now...this war and everything we've been preparing for...doesn't seem important. We want to help and we..." Fred started to protest, but Ron cut him off.

"No Fred. Dad's right...we need to let Remus do this. I lost my best friend today and I feel like part of my heart was ripped out or died too, but I can't imagine how Remus feels...it pale's in comparison. I know he feels like he's let down Sirius and Harry's parents...he feels as if he didn't protect him enough. The last person who gave him some part of his past to hold onto is gone and I can imagine he feels alone and defeated. And besides...just because Harry's gone doesn't mean that this war is over and that Voldemort will stop...because he won't...it'll only get worse. We need to protect each other and brace ourselves for what's to come," said Ron passionately. With that, he slung his backpack on his shoulder and walked out the door to Apparate back to Hermione's.

Everyone in the room was looking at Ron with a new sense of admiration and pride at how much he had grown and matured. He was no longer the goofy, gangly, kid brother that everyone picked on. Ron was a man now. Every brother was proud of the way Ron had handled himself amidst the recent tragedy.   
-------------------------------------- ---------------------------------------- --------------------------------  
Ron landed softly on the landing outside of Hermione's bedroom door. He thought it would be rude to just Apparate in and he didn't want to have to knock on the front door again if he landed outside the house. He knocked softly on the door and pushed it open. Inside, Hermione was sitting on her bed, her back facing Ron and the door. Ron walked up behind her and lightly placed his hand on her shoulder, causing her to start a bit, but she looked up at him and gave him a small smile.

"What are you looking at?" Ron questioned. In Hermione's hand was a small frame, the glass was smattered with fresh tears.

"Just some pictures, school things..." she said trailing off."This one was taken the day after you guys won the Quidditch Cup last year...the day after Ginny and...Harry got together." Ron looked silently at the picture, tears prickling the corners of his eyes. It was a picture of himself, Hermione, Harry, and Ginny. It had been taken by Colin Creevey down by the lake. The four of them where sitting on the ground, Ron holding Hermione in a friendly embrace with his arms around her waist. And Harry was holding Ginny, with his hands around her waist, furiously tickling her while she tried to mess up his already messed up hair. They all looked so carefree...so happy.

"It was the first picture of all four of us together and...and it was the last one of Harry," Hermione whispered. She ran a hand across the glass inside the frame as if reaching out to touch the photo Harry in the picture who was grinning madly and fighting to keep a hold of the photo Ginny. Fresh tears puddled up on the glass and Hermione wiped them away with her sleeve, placing the photo back on her nightstand.

"It's hard to believe that that's all the older he's going to get...that we'll always remember him like that," Ron said as his voice cracked with emotion. He sat down on Hermione's bed and put his head in his hands, kneading his forehead with his palms. "It's only been a day and I'm so worried that I'm going to forget how his voice sounds or about things we used to do or talk about...what if we forget Hermione?"

"I don't think we'll ever forget. We've got so many good memories...so many good times, that we couldn't possibly ever forget him. We'll always have our memories. And we'll always have us," she said sitting down next to Ron on the bed and putting her arm around his neck.

"You know...I always allowed myself to dwell on the possibility that Harry wouldn't make it out of this...that'd we'd lose him. But I never thought it'd be like this. I always figured he'd..." whispered Ron.

"Go down while fighting Voldemort." finished Hermione in a knowing voice.  
"Yeah."

"I think I did too," Hermione reassured him. "You know all I can think about now is whether Harry knew it was coming. Whether he realized what was happening. Is it wrong of me to wish that he didn't and that it was quick and painless or instantaneous even?"

Ron didn't know what to say. He knew for a fact--he'd heard it himself while eavesdropping--that Harry had probably been alive when emergency workers arrived and that he died from injuries caused by being thrown from the car. But he didn't have the heart to tell Hermione that Harry had probably known...probably suffered. So he lied.

"No, you're not wrong in hoping or wishing that he was unaware and wasn't in pain. I hope for the same thing. I don't think I can bring myself to imagine if he had been aware...and alone... knowing he was dying." soothed Ron as he brought Hermione into another hug.

Both of them collapsed on Hermione's bed in a tight embrace, watching the falling afternoon sun wash across the far wall and the room darkened as night fell upon them. They fell asleep shortly after sunset, unmoving and lost in their tormented and grief filled nightmares. Neither of them flinched or made any intention of waking when Mrs. Granger checked on them shortly after suppertime, leaving a tray of sandwiches and juice on Hermione's dresser and covering the two up with a thin sheet. And both of them slept late into the morning the next day, holding each other in comforting embrace.  
------------------------------ ---------------------------------------- -------------------------  
Remus Lupin stared up at the hulking building in front of him. He had already been to four London are hospitals this morning looking for any trace of Dudley Dursley, his girlfriend, or Harry. But so far, he had had no luck.

Staring up at the inviting sign of St. Thomas's, Remus rubbed his tired eyes and took a deep breath before stepping into the cool air-conditioned entrance. He had spent most of the wee hours of the morning of the previous day searching roadsides, searching for Harry. He had then spent the majority of the previous day and afternoon searching hospitals for Harry's body. It was safe to say that the past twenty-four hours had been pure hell, a living nightmare from which there was no waking.

He had read the police report himself, heard second-hand accounts from workers searching the scene and clearing the wreckage, and all of these factor's indicated that Harry Potter, Remus's last link to Lily, James, and Sirius, was dead. His heart was broken, his mind shaken and his body was weary from a lack of rest and a restless night's worth of tossing and turning in an attempt to sleep. He had only consented to rest when Arthur Weasley and his girlfriend Tonks had suggested it.He had to find out what happened. He needed to find Dursley and hear it from the boy himself that Harry was indeed gone.

Remus pushed his way past men, women, and children visiting the hospital, not getting much as a glance from them as they brushed by each other. Remus was in his best Muggle dress: a faded pair of jeans, white polo shirt, and leather loafers. No one would know he was a wizard and no one would suspect that he was searching for the most famous wizard in recent history.  
Remus slowly approached a young women dressed in a tan business suit situated behind a desk that had a sign bearing the words "Information and Patient Check-in" pasted across the front. The women was talking animatedly to a couple who where holding a small child dressed in pajamas. Remus waited patiently behind the couple, waiting his turn.

When the couple took a clipboard full of paperwork and turned toward the sitting area, Remus stepped up to the desk and gave the young women a small smile. He'd already been to four hospitals, and had been told four times that there was no record of a Dursley or Potter and he was afraid of being turned down a fifth time.

"What can I help you with?" she asked sweetly, continuing to type on her computer keyboard.  
"Um...I was wondering if you had a Dursley or Grantman who are currently patients here. They were in an accident and were transferred here," inquired Remus. He had already used this line four times and was afraid he would have to come up with another excuse to why he was looking for a patient that wasn't currently at this hospital, without raising suspicion from Muggle authority.

She tapped frantically at her keyboard, eyeing the flatscreen monitor in front of her.  
"Sara Grantman was released earlier this morning..." she said trailing off and continuing to type. Remus's heart leapt a bit.

"Dursley...Dursley..."she said quietly while scrolling down the screen. "Ah ha...yep. Dudley Brian Dursley is currently being observed on the fourth floor for a laceration to the back and other injuries. Would you like to know what room?" She asked looking up at Remus. Remus's breath caught in his chest. He'd found Dudley...he was right here in this hospital. His heart leapt and then was quickly inflated when he realized that he was now very close to finalizing and confirming his worst nightmare.

"Yes, I'd like to visit him. I'm a friend of his mother and father's and heard about their passing," Remus lied.

"Room 417A. Just follow this hall round' the corner and take the lift to the fourth floor. Take a left down the hall out of the elevator and it should be the eight rooms on the left. Oh and you'll need this," she said as she handed him a badge that said "Visitor." Remus nodded curtly to the young women and pinned the badge on the front of his shirt and set off toward the lifts.

Remus rode the elevator up to the fourth floor, his stomach was in knots and his brain was going a mile a minute. As the lift jerked to a stop and opened he stepped out into the quiet hall, his footsteps echoing eerily into the silence. Halfway down the hallway, eighth door down, Remus stood staring at a door that had the letters "417A" etched into the plastic marker. He could hear soft voices inside and the din of a television in the background. Mustering up all his courage and nerve, he placed his hand on the door handle and started to push it open.

At the same time, the door seemed to pulled inwards and a tall blonde girl with pretty blue eyes was staring back at him, startled, as she was trying to open the door at the same moment.  
"Oh sorry," Remus muttered.

"Oh that's ok...can I help you?" the girl asked, eyeing Remus up and trying to place him.

"Yes. I was wondering if I could talk to Dudley?" he asked, looking over at the large blonde boy who was lying on his side and now staring at Remus.

"If you're a police officer I'm sorry. We've already talked to about a dozen of you and we have nothing new to tell you," she sighed.

"No. I'm actually a friend of the family...and was Harry's professor. My name is Remus Lupin," Remus started.

"You're one of..." Dudley spoke from the bed, "I mean...I've met you at the train station before." Dudley had almost said "You're one of them" but changed tact so his girlfriend wouldn't find out about their families hidden "abnormalities."

Remus nodded kindly. "Yes, you've seen me before at King's Cross."

Remus walked past the girl and laid a hand on Dudley's bed.

"I'm sorry about your parents. How are you doing?" He asked as kindly as he could to the boy.  
Dudley looked away and tried to blink the tears from his eyes. He looked up at Remus and nodded his head.  
"I'm ok...it's just hard right now..." he said trailing off.

"I know..." Remus replied. "Dudley...I know you've been through a terrible ordeal, but I need you to explain to me exactly what happened. I'm trying to figure out exactly what happened myself. We're trying to piece this together."

Dudley looked sadly at the shabbily clad wizard and nodded.

"We were on our way back from Sara's sister's wedding and were only on the road about twenty minutes when my dad passed out and started seizing. Mom went crazy trying to move him off the steering wheel. But we started drifting off the road, "Dudley went silent and Sara went to his side and grasped his hand."I tried to get him to move, but couldn't grab the wheel. Harry took off his seat belt and grabbed for the wheel. He tried jerking us back to the road...but it was too late. We hit a guard rail and ended up flipping down the hill. I must have gotten knocked out...the next thing I remember is crawling out of the car and looking in to see my Mum and Dad...dead. Doctor's said that Dad died of the heart attack and didn't know we crashed, most likely, and Mum died on impact."

Dudley didn't seem to be able to go on, so Sara picked up for him.

"I was knocked out too, but got myself out with only a few cuts and bruises. I found Dudley trying to get his mother out...but we were too late," she whispered softly, stroking the back of Dudley's hand. "We saw that the gas tank was leaking and decided to get away. But half-way up the hill we remembered that Harry wasn't in the car with us. We figured he must have gotten thrown out...he wasn't wearing his seatbelt, " She looked sadly down at her hands, trying to rid her mind of the vision of Harry pinned against the tree. "We went back to look and...and we found him… and he was pinned up against the tree by the car. He must have gotten thrown through the windshield. Dudley lifted the car and we pulled him out and away from the car. But he was bleeding really bad and barely conscious when emergency workers arrived."

Remus buried his head in his hands and used every ounce of strength he had to keep himself from breaking down and crying. His worst nightmare, the worst possible outcome was indeed reality. Harry had been alive when they found him. He hadn't had a quick death and what was worse, was that he had sustained horrific injuries and was probably aware of it. Wanting to finish what he had come to find out, he continued.

"You were taken to Lake Hills Hospital and then…" asked Lupin, not looking up.

"We were transferred here yesterday afternoon to be closer to home and to be with Harry," finished Sara.

Remus looked up at her as if he had heard her wrong.

"They brought Harry's body here?" he asked, screwing up his face in incomprehension. 'Why had they brought his body all the way to London?'

"Body?" asked Dudley, obviously confused.

"Body?" repeated Sara shaking her head in misunderstanding. "You think he's…they told you he was dead?"

"Yes. The police report said he was pronounced dead on the scene…and the way the scene looked…" Remus trailed off, still confused about what was going on.

"They lost him on the scene for a while," added Dudley, "but they shocked him and got him back just before they put him on the helicopter and brought him here."

"He's alive?" cried Remus. "But you made it sound as if…I thought…we thought…"

"Yes, he's alive. I never said he was dead, I just thought you came here to find out what happened because Harry can't tell you," said Dudley.

"He can't...Dudley, where's Harry? Can you take me to him?" asked Remus wildly, his heart beginning to race in his chest.

Dudley looked expectantly at Sara, not sure what to say or how much to tell this man.  
"He's up in the Intensive Care Unit," Sara shared bracingly. "I'm not sure that we'll be able to see him right now. They were planning on doing some tests and checking out some things this afternoon and evening." Remus gave her a confused look.

"Intensive Care Unit?" He repeated. He wasn't sure exactly what that meant in Muggle terms, but he knew it probably wasn't good.

"Yes…I can go check with the nurse and see if we can't see him. Dud and I went to visit him last night when he first woke…" she said as her voice trailed off in a whisper.  
"Could you?" asked Remus pleadingly.

"Yeah…I'll be back," and she strode out of the room, leaving Dudley and Remus lost in their own thoughts.

Remus's head was racing. Harry was alive! He was here in this hospital and alive. But he was obviously hurt and he still wasn't out of the woods. They were doing tests and 'checking things out'. What did that mean?

"Dudley, do you know what kind of tests they were doing?" he asked breaking the silence.

Dudley shrugged. Just then the door opened and Sara, followed by a portly, middle-aged woman walked into the room.

"Marie here says that he should be back from CT and that we can go up and see if he's awake. She'll take us up since it's a closed and controlled ward," Sara informed the two men. "Dud are you coming or would you rather rest?"

"They just changed the bandage an hour ago…I think I'll just stay," he replied.

"Marie, this is…Remus Lupin," she introduced Remus, almost forgetting his name; "He's a friend of the family and Harry's…professor?" Remus nodded in acknowledgement.  
"Right then," Marie said brightly, smiling at Lupin.

Sara and Remus followed the nurse out into the hall and down to the elevators. The three of them entered the lift and stood still and silent as they rose up another four floors, stepping out into a cold, bare, and deadly silent hallway.

Unlike the floor that Dudley was on. There were no doors, brightly colored with cards and "Get Well" signs. There were no happy and cheerful hospital staff, greeting them or smiling at them as they passed. Every employee seemed to be in a hurried state, solemn and silent while doing their job.

Walking down the hall, they reached a pair of automatic glass doors that had the words "Trauma Ward: Must be Accompanied by a nurse or doctor" painted in big white letters. Just outside the doors, Marie stopped and turned towards Remus and Sara, who were following close behind.

"The only way in and out of here is by scan-card," she said quietly, pointing to the credit-card sized key in her hand and the scanner locked onto the door. "Also, when we enter, we ask that you keep your voices down."

Marie took her key and swiped it through the scanner. There was a soft buzzing noise, acknowledging her keycard and then a soft whoosh as the doors opened. Remus and Sara followed Marie into the ward. There was a soft whirr of different machines and the gentle 'blip, blip' of monitors punctuating the deafening silence.

Sara and Remus followed Marie as she crossed the gigantic room. All around there were beds with occupants hooked up to all sorts of machines and had tubes coming out of everywhere. Remus looked around nervously. There were family members leaning over the beds, talking softly and most were crying. Other's had curtains drawn around them to give the family and patients privacy from prying eyes.

The three of them crossed the ward and stopped outside another room that had the door closed and the curtains closed on the windows on either side of the door.

Marie opened the door to reveal a young woman dressed in a nurse's uniform leaning over a bed similar to those out on the open floor of the ward.

"Oh. Hello Kara. Is he awake?" Marie said softly.

The young women turned around at the sound of Marie's voice and looked up from her clipboard. 

"Yup. Just woke up when we brought him back from CT," the young lady, Kara, smiled at the three figures standing at the door and bent down over the bed. "Hey there young man…looks like you've got some visitors. Think you can stay awake to let them say hi?" She seemed to be waiting for some sort of answer and when she got it, she then turned back to the people at the door. "You can come on over and say hi. It's ok," and she beckoned for Marie to allow Sara and Remus to come over to the bed side.

Sara slowly made her way across the room and Remus followed reluctantly behind, afraid of what he was about to see. As they approached the bed and Harry came into view, Remus's breath caught in his chest and his heart broke.

Harry was lying flat on his back against the white backdrop of the sheets he was lying on. There were machines all around him, whirring and beeping. There was a tube coming out of his mouth that Remus knew to be a respirator that was helping him breathe. There were tubes coming out of everywhere; Out of his wrist, his stomach and even his head, which had been shaved. And there was a large line of staples that were obviously holding shut the skin on his head. His face was bruised and scratched.

On his chest and stomach were large bandages and gauze pads. The one on his chest was soaked thoroughly with blood. And then Remus's eyes wrenched to Harry's right side. Where there should have been an arm…there was nothing. Harry's arm started and stopped at the shoulder and a large bandage was wrapped around the area, presumably covering up the wound.

Remus just stood at the end of the bed, staring at the boy as his heart broke and his stomach threatened to turn. He couldn't move. Sara was up near Harry's head, standing over him and stroking his forehead, softly talking to him.

From where Remus stood, he knew Harry could not see his horrified face. He didn't want to scare Harry. Did he know how bad he looked? How could he not?

Sensing his uneasiness, Kara came up from behind Remus and put a hand on his elbow.  
"Why don't you come over here," She said softly leading him toward the left side of the bed. "Why don't you hold his hand and talk to him. He won't be able to answer back…but he blinks once for 'yes' and twice for 'no' though if you ask him something."

Remus looked at her incredulously. Harry looked as if they had done surgery on his head…on his brain. He didn't know a whole lot about Muggle medicine…but even in the Wizarding world, working on that part of the body was risky.

"Is he aware…does he have any damage due to his head injury?" asked Remus quietly, stopping.

"We were worried about that at first, but CT is clear and we stopped the bleeding before there could be any damage. He's actually doing really well and is responding to comands and pain. We do have a tube in his skull to relieve some of the pressure and drain any fluid. He's awake and aware. He's tired and pretty sedated. We have him medically paralyzed with some drugs so he can't move involuntarily and damage something. He has a lot of internal injuries we had to go in and repair and movement could be harmful. He can't squeeze your hand, but he knows people are there and can feel if you hold his hand," she told him while bringing him round the side of Harry's bed and bringing Harry's hand to Remus and entwining them so not to disturb the I.V.

At this sudden movement Harry turned his eyes away from Sara and over to Remus who was now standing over Harry's bed, looking down at him sadly.

Harry's eyes widened in shock and surprise at the sight of Remus. And in the next instant, there was a look of pain and fear in those bright green eyes, starying wildly back at Remus. His conveyed what his body could not.They said, 'Help me and get me out of here.'

"Oh Harry," Remus cried softly, stroking the boys cheek with the back of his hand. A silent tear formed in the corner of Harry's eye and fell slowly down his cheek. "I'm so sorry we couldn't find you sooner kid," Remus apologized quietly, swiping the tear away and letting a few of his own fall.

"I'll leave you two be ok?" Sara said smiling over Harry at Remus. She then leaned over Harry and gave him a kiss on his forehead, trying to mind the staples and tubes. "I'll come visit you tommorow ok?" She then turned to Remus, "And it was nice meeting you." With that she walked slowly out of the room and closed the door softly behind.

The young nurse, who was standing behind Remus, spoke suddenly. "I'm going to get things ready for Harry to be fed and I'll be back in a bit. All these monitors will alert us to any problems, but if we don't come and something's wrong...push that button behind you on the wall. It alerts the whole ward," she said pointing to a red button on the wall. Remus gave her a questioning look. Certainly Harry shouldn't be left alone right now. Sensing his worry she assured him, "He's stable right now, so I wouldn't worry ok?" And with that she picked up her clipboard and walked softly out of the room, leaving Remus alone with Harry.

"We thought we lost you," cried Remus, letting his pent up emotions pour out. He told Harry the story of how the Aurors guarding him had lost the car and tried to find him and when they failed, they alerted the Order of Harry's dissapearance. He told him about the reports and accounts of Harry's death and how they'd been trying to track down Dudley without alerting Death Eaters or You-Know-Who himself. Harry just lay there, following Remus's face with his tired eyes, furowing his brow and trying to understand everything Remus was telling him.

"...Then I came here and found Dudley and he told me you were alive," finished Remus a tear-filled smile on his face. "But I'm so sorry kid...I'm sorry you had to go through all this...had to suffer," Remus muttered sadly, taking in Harry's battered and broken body with his eyes. Harry looked at Remus sadly with his eyes as if to say, 'Don't! This is not your fault.'  
"We're going to get you out of here ok? When I leave here, I'm going to alert the Order and we're going to figure out someway to get you out of here and home," Remus promised Harry, tightening his squeeze on Harry's hand. "It might take a bit longer as we're trying to keep You-Know-Who or anyone from finding out...you understand that, right?" He asked, waiting for Harry to blink once. When he did, he continued. "I just need you to hang in there, while we figure things out. I'm going to stay with you as long as I can...but I'm going to have to leave you here tonight, I'm sorry."

Harry looked at Remus and blinked once in understanding. 'How was it that Harry was so strong? How could he have gone through all this and still be willing to go through more to make sure things were done right, done safe?' Remus wondered to himself.

Just then Kara, the young nurse walked into the room with a cart full of tubing and bags filled with fluid. She smiled at Remus who was still standing over Harry's bed, clutching his hand. She walked over to the corner and pulled up a soft chair behind Remus and guided him into it.

"Here, you can sit with him while we feed him. It'll take about an hour...normally our visiting hours end at eight, but it'll be almost eight-thirty when we're finished. But you can stay with him the whole time if you'd like," she said, smiling at Remus at the same time she began setting tubing and bags of a white colored liquid on the bed. She turned to Harry and leaned close to him, so he could see her face. "Time to eat big guy.Need to keep you strong so you can keep on impressing the ladies when you get out of here," she said cheekily, smiling at Harry. Harry looked up at Remus, who had a small smile on his face and then turned his attention back to the nurse who had taken a hold of the tube that was sticking out of Harry's abdomen.

"Um...What are you doing?" Remus asked curiously.

"Oh. This is called a G-tube and it's what we use to feed intravenus and fluid nutrition and supplements directly into his stomach so he can keep him healthy. He can't eat food by mouth because of the ventilator and this is the quickest way to get the nutrition he needs into his body," she informed Remus while showing him the tube and the bags of "nutrition." She continued to clamp the end of the tube and twisted off a small cover. She then connected another end of a tube onto the bag and placed it into a machine that hung on a stand next to the bed, pushing buttons and causing it to start humming gently. She connected the Harry's tube to the one coming from the bag and removed the clamp, allowing the white fluid to drain down the tube and into Harry's stomach.

As the liquid reached the part where the tube went through the skin, Harry's stomach muscles contracted and twitched suddenly, causing Remus to gasp in alarm.

"Does it hurt him?" Remus asked worridly.

"No...I spose it's just cold to his muscles and that's what causes them to contract. He has no control of his muscles now that we have him sedated,so that's a normal reaction to the tube," she said, not looking up and watching the feeding monitor while making notes on her clipboard. Not totally believing her, she turned to Harry who blinked twice as if to tell him that it didn't hurt.

Remus sat there for the next hour or so in almost total silence, watching Harry and taking in the scene before him. He didn't want to leave him here tonight and allow them to continue to treat him in what seemed like a most barbaric fashion. Kara was in and out of the room, checking monitors and talking to Remus and Harry, suprised that Harry had been up for so long.

There was only five more minutes to go, according to the monitor, in the feeding when Harry suddenly took a deep gasp of air and one of the machines started to beep softly. Kara moved quickly to Sara's side and pushed a button on the monitor, silencing it. She grasped the tube and moved it a bit to the side, adjusting it and then placing then re-placing the tape to hold it in place.

"What happened?" asked Remus alarmed.

"That was the ventilator being triggered. He's starting to take breaths on his own and when he did, the tube moved and was pushing against the wall of the lung. I adjusted it and it should be fine now. It's actually a really good sign that he's trying to breathe," she informed Remus.  
Remus looked down and saw that Harry had his eyes clamped shut and it was evident that the event had caused him some level of discomfort. Seeing Harry's discomfort, Kara leaned over and adjusted a gauge on one of the machines and turned to Remus.

"I'm going to give him a bit more medicine to help with the discomfort...he'll probably drop off to sleep now," she said softly.

"Thanks," Remus smiled at her gratefully. He turned back to Harry and leaned in closer to his face. "I'm going to have to leave now ok? I'll be back with the Order as soon as I can. You sleep and get some rest," He placed a soft kiss on Harry's forhead and gave his hand another squeeze before turning slowly and making his way to the door, stopping to take in one more glance at Harry before he headed out the door.

------------------------------- ---------------------------------------- -----------------------------------  
Har ry felt his eyes begin to droop and listened as Remus told him goodbye and promised that he'd be back to get him...to save him.

Harry's heart lept and through all the pain and fear he felt a flicker of hope. He was no longer lost, the Order had found him and he wasn't going to be alone anymore.

He watched Remus's sad and defeated figure turn and walk from his bedside and then turned his attention back to the ceiling, letting his eyes close and sleep take him away from reality.


End file.
